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being of a good-natur'd turn, and rather wishing other people to die than myself, declined the invitation. But come, Georgiana, I must go change my clothes, and then put by my mourning in lavender for the great Thomas Tick, Esquire ;--and if at present my good-nature keeps me under, this you may depend on, I'll stand up for you the moment I have got in all my legacies.
END OF THE FIRST ACT.
FOLLY AS IT FLIES.
A CT II.
SCENE I.-An Apartment at Sir Herbert's.
Enter Sir Herbert and Dr. Infallible.
Sir Herb. ES, Sir; I thank you for the offer of
your friendly loan; but the arrival of my son makes it unnecessary.
Doctor. Very well, Sir Herbert--but money's no ohject to me, and if at any time you will condescend to be
Sir Herb. Sir, again I thank you--but with regard to Georgiana, this is my fix'd intention-gain her consent, and I will give you mine. But, anxious as I am to see her married, I wou'dn't barter her for all the gold that even you can offer.
Doelor. What! you are anxious to see her married !
Sir Herb. Yes, the loves my son, for whom I've higher views; therefore, address her, for, as I know your character is unimpeached, and in the way of settlement
Doctor. Ay: Radix Rheno for that, Sir Herbert, I'll go make love to her directly, and as for my patient, Mr. Poft Obit
Sir Herb. Oh, he moves as I direct. Success attend you. At present, I'm engag’d on business with my son-and if in marriage Georgiana emulates her cousin, your present wealth will feem contemptible--for you'll have gain'd a treasure worth the world.
Dostor. Bravo! this is the age for quacking, and all clever fellows are at it, from the Merry Andrew on his roftrum to the doctor in his chariot.
Enter Post Obic (newly drest).
Poft Obit. Oh Doctor! my dear Doctor! is this Bed. lam, or is it Sir Herbert Melmoth’s ? I thought to pass a quiet month here, and after enduring insula upon insult, what do you think? I am now to be thot at.
Doctor. Shot at ?
Post Obit. You shall hear. - Just now, after dinner, the captain and Sir Paddy began talking of duelling. The former boasted he had lately wing'd a brother officer, for traducing his dear love of a waistcoat ; (mimicking) and Sir Paddy lamented he hadn'c fought for a whole month, tho' he had every where offered five pounds for an affront.—This, you may be sure, somewhat alarm’d me; and on their asking me if I had ever fought, I replied, “ No, not that I recollect ;" on which Mr. Jerry Cursicor observed, “ recollect indeed! why, he never has, and never will, unless some of you will leave him a thumping legacy, then, of course, he'll try to blow your brains out." This nettled me a good deal, and, one word bringing on another, says I, "I ask your pardon, Mr. Curlitor, but that's a lie."--Says he, “ I hope no offence," and he knock'd me down.
Doctor. Indeed! and what followed ?
Post Obit. What! why, the Captain, and Sir Paddy instantly rang the bell, called for horse-pistols, and fwore only one of us could leave the room alive! But Cursitor and I were of a different opinion-we wished the matter to drop, and said it was a joke. “ Joke," says the Captain, forcing a cock'd pistol into my hand, « Poltroon, did he not give you a blow ?” “ No," says 1, " he did not; did you, my dear Cursitor ? And if he did, I dare say I deserved it, and, therefore I'm ready to apologize."--" Pooh!” says Sir Paddy, “ it's no longer their affair-people don't fight to please themfelves, they fight to please che town.”_". Damn the
town, ” faid we « our honour is completely satisfied; I've given him the lie, and he has knocked me down ; and if we fire away till doomsday, how can we have more satisfactory satisfaction ?”
Doctor. What! and did they let you off?
Post Obit. No-only gave us leave of absence till we made our wills, and then they are to come and cane us if we don't go back and be killed. But, Doctor-my dear Doctor-you, who understand life and death, can't you contrive ?
Doétor. (Contrive! what, make me a party in your cowardice! Go, Sir, go fight directly, and at least once in your life, give proofs of personal courage.
Poft Obit. Once in my life! Come, that's not handfome, Sir. You know very well I have given proofs of personal courage.
Doctor. When? on what occasion, my little
Port Obit. When! why, if you will have it, when I drank a bottle of your Radix Rheno. If that isn't giving proofs of personal courage, the devil's in't. And, now I think on't, your are the last man I shou'd have applied to-for Alexander himself wasn't a greater warrior than a quack doctor ; so I'll go talk to somebody else.
Doktor. Adieu! and if you wish to please the pretty creatures, be yourself another Alexander. Honor is the true love-powder, and we, heroes, are elixir vitæ to the ladies.
[Exit. Post Obit. Puppy ! if I must turn out, take care I don't pick my man. But yonder I see an old friend in the ball-room-and if he won't intercede for me, and I can't get rid of my good-nacure, why, I'll return to these ferocious secondslay, I can't bear to have the thing upon my mind, and fairly beg that they will cane me directly
SCENE II.-A magnificent Room fitted up in the Eastern
Style. (Music beard.)
Leonard. This Sir Herbert Melmoth! this the idol of his tenantry! of the poor, and of his country! this my father ! herding with people he has ever scorned, mixing in scenes as opposite to him as to right feeling and to nature. O Georgiana! I will indeed reflect.
Shenkin. How you to do, Mr. Leonard? How do you like all this revelling and tevelling? this mobbing and robbing ?
Leonard. Tell me, Shenkin, have all these visitors been long Sir Herbert's friends ?
Shenkin. Friends! plels my soul, he do not know 'em, nor do they know him.-My Lady do want a great pig crowd, you do fee; and so she do peg, and pray of any body, to ask any pody.—Then she do hire some visitors by the night.
Leonard. Hire visitors!
Shenkin. Ifs sure: Do you think, Mr. Leonard, people would come, and be smok'd and smother'd, and ramm’d and jamm’d, and hear such noise and nonsense without being paid for it? Look you, -those foreign fingers yonder-pointing to the supper room) there eating like vultures-- They are not only paid, buc chey will not open their mouths to fing, till they have opened their mouths to eat. No long, no supper ; that is their way, Mr. Leonard.
Shenkin. Then, some do come without any invitation at all; for I did hear that tall gentleman there, (pointing again,) him with the rough lion head, and the thin pur