When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing AbuseWritten by a therapist who specializes in abusive men, this guide reveals how abusers interact with and manipulate children—and how mothers can help their children recover from the trauma of witnessing abuse. Can my partner abuse me and still be a good parent? Should I stay with my partner for my children's sake? How should I talk to my children about the abuse and help them heal? Am I a bad mother? Mothers in physically or emotionally abusive relationships ask themselves these questions every day. Whether it’s physical or “just” emotional abuse, whether it’s aimed at them or you, whether they see or hear it, your kids need you. This book, the first ever of its kind, shows mothers how to: • Protect children and help them heal emotionally • Provide love, support, and positive role models, even in the midst of abuse • Increase their chances of winning custody • Help their kids feel good about themselves “A must-read for every mother who has been abused...it offers the knowledge women need to protect their children and help them heal.”—William S. Pollack, Ph.D., author of the national bestseller Real Boys |
Contents
21 | |
Three Abusive Men as Parents | 40 |
Four Understanding Your Childrens Inner World | 60 |
Five Protecting Your Childrens Boundaries | 91 |
The Abusive Man and Family Dynamics | 109 |
Eight Maintaining Healthy Dynamics in Your Family | 137 |
Nine To Leave or Not to Leave | 156 |
Ten Dealing with Child Protective Services | 171 |
Twelve Abusive Men as PostSeparation Parents | 210 |
Thirteen Making Your Way in the Family Court System | 234 |
Children Moving Forward | 263 |
Fifteen Empowering Your Children | 291 |
Sixteen Stopping the Cycle of Abuse | 312 |
Resources | 337 |
Hearing the Personal Accounts of Abused Mothers | 357 |
137 | 359 |
Other editions - View all
When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse Lundy Bancroft No preview available - 2005 |
When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse Lundy Bancroft No preview available - 2005 |
Common terms and phrases
abused mothers abused women abusive man's abusive men abusive partner adults anger angry assistance behavior better blame boys cause chapter chil child abuse child protective services Child Sexual Abuse child support children need clients crying custody and visitation custody evaluators daughter divorce domestic abuse domestic violence dren emotional emotionally ex-partner example experience family court father fear feel going healing hear help your children hurt intimidation involved judge Kaleigh keep kind Kristen leave lives look manipulation Mariel mistreatment mothers and children offer okay parents partner abuse physical police post-separation problems professional program for abused relationship Resources response role Russel Hoban safe safety plan scary sexual abuse siblings sive social workers sometimes stop strategies talk tantrums tell therapist told trauma turn upset victim blaming visitation litigation witnessing abuse woman yelling