being of a good-natur'd turn, and rather wishing other people to die than myself, declined the invitation. But come, Georgiana, I must go change my clothes, and then put by my mourning in lavender for the great Thomas Tick, Efquire;-and if at prefent my good-nature keeps me under, this you may depend on, I'll ftand up for you the moment I have got in all my legacies.

[Exeunt.

END OF THE FIRST ACT.

ACT II.

SCENE I.-An Apartment at Sir Herbert's.

i

Sir Herb.

Enter Sir Herbert and Dr. Infallible.

YES,

ES, Sir; I thank you for the offer of your friendly loan; but the arrival of my fon makes it unneceffary.

Doctor. Very well, Sir Herbert-but money's no object to me, and if at any time you will condefcend to be my banker

Sir Herb. Sir, again I thank you-but with regard to Georgiana, this is my fix'd intention-gain her confent, and I will give you mine. But, anxious as I am to fee her married, I wou'dn't barter her for all the gold that even you can offer.

Door. What! you are anxious to fee her married! Sir Herb. Yes, he loves my fon, for whom I've higher views; therefore, addrefs her, for, as I know your character is unimpeached, and in the way of fettlement

Door. Ay: Radix Rheno for that, Sir Herbert. I'll go make love to her directly, and as for my patient, Mr. Poft Obit

Sir Herb. Oh, he moves as I direct.-Succefs attend you. At prefent, I'm engag'd on business with my fon-and if in marriage Georgiana emulates her coufin, your present wealth will feem contemptible-for you'll have gain'd a treasure worth the world.

[Exit. Dolor.

Doctor. Bravo! this is the age for quacking, and all clever fellows are at it, from the Merry Andrew on his roftrum to the doctor in his chariot.

Enter Poft Obit (newly dreft).

[Going.

Poft Obit. Oh Doctor! my dear Doctor! is this BedJam, or is it Sir Herbert Melmoth's? I thought to pass a quiet month here, and after enduring infult upon infult, what do you think? I am now to be

fhot at.

Doctor. Shot at?

Poft Obit. You shall hear.-Juft now, after dinner, the captain and Sir Paddy began talking of duelling.-The former boasted he had lately wing'd a brother officer, for traducing his dear love of a waistcoat; (mimicking) and Sir Paddy lamented he hadn't fought for a whole month, tho' he had every where offered five pounds for an affront. This, you may be fure, fomewhat alarm'd me; and on their asking me if I had ever fought, I replied, "No, not that I recollect;" on which Mr. Jerry Curfitor obferved, " recollect indeed! why, he never has, and never will, unless fome of you will leave him a thumping legacy, then, of course, he'll try to blow your brains out." This nettled me a good deal, and, one word bringing on another, fays I, I ask your pardon, Mr. Curfitor, but that's a lie."-Says he, " I hope no "I offence," and he knock'd me down.

Doctor. Indeed! and what followed?

Poft Obit. What! why, the Captain, and Sir Paddy instantly rang the bell, called for horfe-piftols, and fwore only one of us could leave the room alive! But Curfitor and I were of a different opinion-we wished the matter to drop, and faid it was a joke. Joke," fays the Captain, forcing a cock'd piftol into my hand,"Poltroon, did he not give you a blow?" "No," fays 1," he did not; did you, my dear Curfitor? And if he did, I dare fay I deferved it, and, therefore I'm ready to apologize."-" Pooh !" fays Sir Paddy," it's no longer their affair-people don't fight to please themfelves, they fight to please the town."-" Damn the town,"

B 2

town," faid we "our honour is completely fatisfied; I've given him the lie, and he has knocked me down; and if we fire away till doomfday, how can we have more fatisfactory fatisfaction?"

Doctor. What! and did they let you off?

Poft Obit. No-only gave us leave of abfence till we made our wills, and then they are to come and cane us if we don't go back and be killed. But, Doctor-my dear Doctor-you, who understand life and death,can't you contrive ?

Doctor. Contrive! what, make me a party in your cowardice! Go, Sir, go fight directly, and at least once in your life, give proofs of perfonal courage.

Poft Obit. Once in my life! Come, that's not handfome, Sir. You know very well I have given proofs of perfonal courage.

Doctor. When? on what occafion, my little

Poft Obit. When! why, if you will have it, when I drank a bottle of your Radix Rheno. If that isn't giving proofs of perfonal courage, the devil's in't. And, now I think on't, your are the laft man I fhou'd have applied to-for Alexander himself wasn't a greater warrior than a quack doctor; fo I'll go talk to fomebody else.

Doctor. Adieu! and if you wish to please the pretty creatures, be yourself another Alexander. Honor is the true love-powder, and we, heroes, are elixir vitæ to the ladies.

[Exit.

Poft Obit. Puppy! if I muft turn out, take care I don't pick my man. But yonder I fee an old friend in the ball-room-and if he won't intercede for me, and I can't get rid of my good-nature, why, I'll return to these ferocious fecondsfay, I can't bear to have the thing upon my mind, and fairly beg that they will cane me directly.

[Exit.

SCENE

SCENE II.-Amagnificent Room fitted up in the Eastern
Style. (Mufic beard.)

Enter Leonard.

Leonard. This Sir Herbert Melmoth! this the idol of his tenantry! of the poor, and of his country! this my father! herding with people he has ever fcorned, mixing in scenes as oppofite to him as to right feeling and to nature. O Georgiana! I will indeed reflect.

Enter Shenkin.

Shenkin. How you to do, Mr. Leonard? How do you like all this revelling and tevelling? this mobbing and robbing?

Leonard. Tell me, Shenkin, have all these visitors been long Sir Herbert's friends?

Shenkin. Friends! ple's my foul, he do not know 'em, nor do they know him.-My Lady do want a great pig crowd, you do fee; and fo fhe do peg, and pray of any body, to ask any pody.-Then the do hire fome visitors by the night.

Leonard. Hire vifitors!

Shenkin. Ifs fure: Do you think, Mr. Leonard, people would come, and be fmok'd and fmother'd, and ramm'd and jamm'd, and hear fuch noife and nonfenfe without being paid for it? Look you,-thofe foreign fingers yonder-(pointing to the fupper room) thereeating like vultures-They are not only paid, but they will not open their mouths to fing, till they have opened their mouths to eat. No long, no fupper; that is their way, Mr. Leonard.

Leonard. Indeed!

Shenkin. Then, fome do come without any invitation at all; for I did hear that tall gentleman there, (pointing again,) him with the rough lion head, and the thin purв 3

terfly