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Craft. But as the old pigeon is arrived, we must combine to pluck him; and, first, we must undermine this favorite he has brought with him.

Mrs. L. What favorite?

Craft. Why, a lady he met with last night at the hotel. He has already conceived a great regard for her: but, as he acknowledges he knows nothing of her, and Clifford assures me she is a woman of suspicious character, you'll give hints on her introduction.

Mrs. L. Never fear, leave me alone—I'll fay I know her.

Cabr. That's enough—if she says she is one of her acquaintances, 'tis all over with her—or if that fails, I'll fay she is one of mine.

Craft. Good! and now, while Mrs. Lackbrain disposes of the company, and puts on a more plain and appropriate dress, you and I will go and receive the old gentleman.—And remember, from this hour you are plain simple cottagers; and, hard and ;rklome as it is, you must henceforth appear a fond, loving couple.

Mrs. L. (sighing.) 'Tis very irksome! but we must do it: but, go, go, and impose on your credulous uncle.

Gabr. I'll do what my head will let me, for at this moment there's more dancing in it than in your ball-room. However, if there's any danger, guardy here will lend me his little octavo; and, now I think on't, we must take pains on his account, because he paid for all this pretty furniture, you know. Ha! ha! ha!—

Craft. Pstia! nonsense; come along and try, try to disguise your situation.

Gabr. Pooh! don't my situation disguise me? Besides, what are you afraid of—remember the sons of genius. Didn't I, by drinking a few generous bumpers, make a fool of him who has made a fool of thousands ?—but now for it—now let me recollect—I am a fond, steady—u—u—h!' (biccuping) That's it, I'm the exact thing already. [Exit with Craftly,—Mrs. Lackbrain at folding doors..

SCENE—Outside of a Cottage, standing in a romantic Vale surrounded by Mountains,

Enter Primitive and Mrs. Belforo.

Trim. Huzza, there! there it is, the end of all my hopes and all my wishes! Delightful, innocent, romantic sight!

Mrs. B. This is, indeed, a spot more lovely than e'en my fancy pictured.

Prim. Oh! 'tis Arcadia! Paradise! And, to make my joys unbearable, think that Nature does not alone confine herself to the outside; no, (he also dwells within. And the young cottagers—the dear, the darling pair! but represent the spot around them.

Mrs. B. No doubt: for here is no temptation to be guilty, (singing in cottage—" Come, come one "and all" &c.) Listen, what singing's that?

Prim. Don't you know { It is the plowman as he trudges to his morning's work, carolling his simple ditty! Sweet fascinating sound ! {Music in cottage.} And, hark again! Do you hear that music?

Mrs, B. I do: to me it sounded like a flute.

E 4 Prim,

Prim. Flute! bless you—it is the shepherd's pipe—it is the music of Arcadia! Oh! is this lasts, I shan't live to lee the inside.

Enter James from the Cottage.

Heh! who comes here? One of the servants—• mum! He won't know me, so I'll be cunning and sift him—now mind—Good morning, Sir.

James. The fame to you, Sir.

Prim. I wish to speak with Mr. or Mrs. Lackbrain; but 'tis too early, I suppose, they are neither of them out of bed yet.

James. Yes, Sir, they are both up.

Prim. Up! what, at five in the morning?

James. Yes; and, what's more extraordinary, they are up every morning at the fame hour.

Prim. There now, in London, who ever hears of such early rising? One question more, if you please—Pray where may you be going?

James. Why, if you must know, Sir, I am going to leave these cards of invitation at some great houses about twelve miles off (produces them).

Prim. Cards of invitation! I don't like rhatj it smacks of the squares—the city—the—give me leave (Jakes one and reads.) "Mss. Gabriel Lack"brain at home every evening this week:" you may go—I'm satisfied !—never—never was such an instance of domestic and connubial happiness!—at home every evening! come Jet us enter and behold. [Exit James.

Enter Craftly and Gabriel, still drunk.

Craft, (speaking as he enters.") This way, Gar briel—this way—

Gab. Softly, the air makes me worse—your arm, Jend me your arm—(lays bold of Craftly 's arm.)

Prim. There he is! there's the true, genuine, and unadulterated child of nature—Come to thy uncle's arms (gab. is afraid to leave Craftly'j arm). S'Jife, what are you afraid of, Gabriel? come to thy uncle's arms, I fay! (g/.b. leaves Craftly'j arm, but finding be can't support himself, staggers and reels back to Craftly) look! now, look at that rural embarrassment! don't be ashamed, boy, it is worth all the ease and impudence of town-bred puppies.

Gabr. I'm quite overcome, I assure you, uncle.

Prim. Delightful diffidence! you rogue, I've heard of your pranks, of your early rising every morning, and of your being at home every evening; and if I hadn't, your countenance would have betrayed you:—look at that flush of health (gabr. smiles)—look at that rosy hue (gabr. bursts cut laughing)—ha, ha! there again! now that's the true broad laugh of innocence and nature.

Gabr. {aside to Craft.) I fay, guardy, there's no fear of his finding me out—for ecod! he's as drunk as Chloe,

Prim. But come, where is your other half? If (he prove as uncorrupted as yourself, I shan't wait till the year's out, no—I'll sign the settlement tomorrow.

Enter Mrs. Lackbrain in a slain Chip Hat,
Cloak, &V.

Craft. That's well, that's a neat cottage dress.
Gabr. Ah! here she is, uncle, here's the sweet
source of connubial joy.
Mrs. L. Dear Gabriel!
Gabr. Divine Lydia! {taking her hand and kissing

Prim.

Prim. Fond pair! the Golden Age is returned, and I fee—(taking out bis handkerchief and half crying)-r-\ fee they were born to make me the happiest of middle-aged gentlemen.—But now for it, now for the inside.—Odfheart! I forgot though r—I must particularly lecommend this lady to the attention of you both j me is an object of compassion (taking Mrs. B. by the hand,); and, as such, I'm sure must be welcome, (gabr. and Mrs. L. hoth draw back.)—Why, what d'ye stare at ?— She deserves it, believe me, she deserves it.

Mrs. L. No doubt: but pray, Sir, have you known the lady long?

Prim. /Till yesterday I never saw her.

Mrs. L. So I thought:—but this is not a proper place for explanation; pray walk in, and we'll talk further.—This way, Ma'am, this way.

Prim. Aye, this way.—And now, as the song fays,

Henceforth I'll lead a village life,

In cottage most obfcure-a;
For, with this loving man and wife,
My joys are quite fecure-a.
{Exeunt Primitive, Mrs B. and Mrs. L*

Craft. Well, Gabriel, what do you think?

Gabr. Think ! that he beats me hollow.;—I'm only a child of nature; but, damme! he's a natural. And now, if spouse undermines she stranger—

Craft. Aye, once get her out of the house, and Cliffoid will instantly take her abroad. You fee that vtsll-1 yonder—he's waiting for me to bring; him information.

Gabr. Indeed!

Craft. Yes: and Marchmont and his daughter are for ever cut out of their chance. So now all's

safe;

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