rare combination of talent brings every thing that Mr. Dibdin describes as most interesting, immediately before the eye of the reader; whether it pertain to the peculiarities of costume, the interest of portrait, the fidelity of fac-similes, the beauty of romantic landscape, or the imposing characteristics of ancient architecture.

GRIMM'S GHOST. LETTER III.

THE Annual Exhibition of the Royal Academy of Artists, at Somerset House, is just closed. So are the Courts of Law at Westminster, to make way for the ceremony of the King's Coronation; but they will not long be re-opened before a curious subject of litigation will, in all probability, exercise the ingenuity of the gentlemen of the long robe. Let the defendant's solicitor tell his own story.

THE ARTISTS' LETTER-BOX.

Case, for the opinion of Mr. Serjeant SPLIT-HAIR.

The artists who exhibit their pictures annually at the Royal Academy at Somerset House, situate in the parish of Saint Mary-le-Strand, in the county of Middlesex, are, by a bye-law of the committee, entitled to receive letters upon professional business, whether by the general or twopenny post, free of postage. This privilege, in process of time, became the source of considerable abuse. Communications of the most trivial and unprofessional affairs were, through the medium of the Lombard-street office, opened between Somerset House and all parts of the united kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland. One-pound notes to miniature painters from sweethearts at Bath and Bristol; bills for turpentine and canvass from Manchester to gentlemen in the historical line; how-d'ye-do's from aunts at Whitby; and dunning scrawls from unpaid bathers at Margate and Brighton, were, like the operation of the poor-rates upon the landholders, gradually undermining the funds of the committee.

To check this growing evil, the committee on the 1st of May, 1820, entered into the following resolution:

"Resolved-That, in order to diminish the late alarming, and as it is suspected, unnecessary increase in the charge of postage, all letters addressed to artists, at the Royal Exhibition in Somerset House, be opened by the secretary; that such letters as relate to private business be forwarded to the parties to whom they are addressed, to be by them paid for; and that such letters as relate to professional business be impounded by this committee, and kept in a box to be entitled 'The Artists' Letter-Box,' where they may be severally and occasionally inspected by the painters for whom they are intended. But that the same be upon no account removed, except by this committee, or its agent or agents duly authorized."

According to invariable usage, all waste papers, consisting of covers of letters, cancelled tickets, paid checks, &c. &c. are delivered over as perquisites to the porter who waits in the hall near the gigantic statue of Hercules. That office is now, and has been for eighteen months, occupied by Tobias Trudge.

On the 12th of July, 1821, Tobias Trudge brought to the shop of Messrs. Colburn and Co. in Conduit-street, a mahogany box, about two feet square, with an aperture at the top sufficiently large to admit letters, with the words "Artists' Letter-Box" marked with white paint upon the lid. The porter stated that, according to custom, the box was delivered to him, by the chairman of the committee, the key being at that time in the lock, that he might take out and appropriate its contents, as waste-paper. Tobias Trudge further alledged, that in crossing Catherinestreet, in the parish aforesaid, in order to enter his lodgings, situate in Broad-court, Bow-street, also in the parish aforesaid, he was corporeally encountered by a very tall new Haymarket comic actor; and that the jostle of the encounter caused the key of the box to fly from the lock, and to fall down the area of the Feather-bed Warehouse at the corner of Catherine-street, whence, notwithstanding all his labour and pains, he had been unable to extricate it. The porter, therefore, brought the box, locked as it was, to the aforesaid publishers, offering to sell to them its contents at a venture. The words used upon that occasion by the porter were as follows; "Will you buy a pig in a poke?" The porter was desired to call again on the morrow. the mean time your opinion is requested,

In

1. Whether Messrs. Colburn and Co. can safely, legally, and equitably complete the bargain so as above-mentioned offered to be made with them?

2. Whether, by so doing, and subsequently publishing the contents of the box in the New Monthly, or any other Magazine, they will render themselves liable to an action, of Trover, of debet et detinet, an action upon the case, a bill in equity, a bill for an injunction, an indictment, an ex-officio information at the suit of the Attorney General, or any and what other process, at the suit of the artists, the committee, the trustees of Somerset House, the writers of the letters, the frequenters of the exhibition, the creditors of the porter, or any and which of them, or any and what other person or persons?

3. And, upon the whole, how would you advise Messrs. Colburn and Co. to act, in order to obtain the greatest possible profit at the least possible risk?

Upon this case Mr. Serjeant SPLIT-HAIR, on the following day, gave the following opinion:

1. This case is not without its difficulties. I am disposed to think that I am of opinion, that had the proferred article been bona fide a Pig in a Poke, no action would lie.-See Law dicta, caveat emptor, in pari delicto, and volenti non fit injuria. In the case of Pig in Poke, the laxity and elasticity of the latter, enables the purchaser of the former, by the aid of finger and thumb, to ascertain the limbs and liveliness, the gaiety and grunt, of the Pig, howsoever small.-See Bacon's Abridgment, vol. 1. p. 42. But this is a case of mahogany: a more obdurate material, yet I am disposed to think that both buyer and carrier are ex necessitate bound to a knowledge of its contents.-See Wood's Conveyancing, vol. 2. p. 56. Non constat but its contents may

be felonious, viz. a threat to fire a barn.-See Burn's Justice, vol. 3. p. 7. Or treasonable, viz. an order to paint a king's head in a charger. -See Rex v. Bradshaw, 1st Cromwell, p. 47. Or libellous, and therefore no windfall.-See Rex v. Woodfall, 1 Term Rep. 42. Or not worth powder and shot.-See Doge of Venice v. Elliston, 4 Theatr. Record. p. 79. The safety, therefore, of the transaction will depend upon its legality, and its legality upon the verdict of the jury.

2. I do not think that publication will render Messrs. Colburn and Co. liable to an action at the suit of the artists, or of any one of them, provided due caution be used in concealing their names, or only denoting them by their initials: no jury could be led to believe that even in the event of detection, they could suffer any injury in their feelings or otherwise; although from the force of their brotherly love, the feelings of one might be held to be lacerated by any ridicule cast upon another: in the which case it might be a question whether an action would not lie at the suit of painter A for a pasquinade upon painter B.-See Hoax's Credat Judæus, vol. 1. p. 20. I think, as a measure of precaution, general releases, upon proper stamps, should be procured from the writers of the letters, the committee, the trustees of Somerset-house, and the frequenters of the exhibition. Stamps may be procured under the same roof. Search should also be made at the Bankrupt-office, to ascertain whether any commission had issued against Tobias Trudge on the day of the proffer.

3. If Messrs. Colburn and Co. wish to procure the greatest possible profit, they will proceed with the publication. But, if at the least possible risk, and if, as I am led to believe, the letter-committee be also the hanging committee, I should advise Messrs. Colburn and Co., as a measure of precaution, to secure the state apartments in Newgate.

SOMNOLENT SPLIT-HAIR, Brick Court, Temple, 13th July, 1821. The hint at the close of the Serjeant's opinion has been disregarded. Out have come the contents of the artist's letter-box. And "here they are," as the children's story-books say.

Mrs. MEADOWCROFT to Mr. O—

I wish, my dear sir, to communicate a fact to you, in confidence, which I have hitherto kept from my most intimate friends. I was forty on the fifteenth of last April. You start! and well you may. Who would take me for more than thirty-one? Major Gorget, last Monday, at the United Service Club, betted a dozen of claret that I was only twenty-six. He told me of it on Tuesday morning. Thank heaven! there is nothing deceitful about me but my appearance. I think you need not make me look quite so young as the Major imagines me to be. Suppose we say twenty-eight: or twenty-nine at farthest. Sir T. L. turns out nothing older than twenty-three. But this, I think, is carrying things a little too far. Time's progress may be checked a little, but Sir T. positively knocks him down on the king's highway. Well! concluding that twenty-nine is to be the age, all you will have to do is to transplant a little of my fat from my body to my face. Upon the ave

I rage, am just fat enough; but it is a treacherous fluid, and is apt, at my age, to desert the visage and take refuge in the stomach. Be it your task, Mr. O. to counteract this. My new stays came home last night, and I assure you they have made me quite another being. So slender in the waist! When the fat quits the forehead and cheeks, it leaves the skin puckered. I had nearly said wrinkled, but it will be time to adopt that epithet twenty years hence. Arrow-root fattens, but too impartially: I wish for some drug which will produce that effect only on the face. Are you acquainted with any such medicine? Not that it much signifies at my time of life. I am divided about the forehead. Suppose you paint it as smooth as ivory: or suppose you cover it with a cluster of curls: I declare I hardly know which to decide upon. The ivory would give me more the air of Juno: the curls that of Hebe. I have preferred the latter to the former goddess ever since I read Telemachus, as translated by Smollett. Hebe then let it be. I set off to-morrow for Brighton; if Major Gorget calls in Newman-street, be sure not to tell him of my place of refuge. He is too pressing poor Mr. Meadowcroft has not been dead more than five months: yes, he has it is five months and two days: bless me, how time flies! Say nothing to the Major: but let him, by all means, see my portrait. If you have finished the face, with a suitable expression, that is to say, with a good-humoured severity, tempering dignity with humility, and acquiescence with denial, my eyes will articulate what follows. "You are too abrupt: fie, Major, a soldier and afraid. Let me hear no more of this: Kind Sir, repeat that strain. Follow me not into Sussex, as you value my good opinion: I mean to keep my retreat at No. 2, Pavilion Parade, Brighton, a secret from all the world." Surely, Mr. O. an artist of your talents may tell all this upon canvass. Do it then, and spare a widow's blushes. I can't conceive what you mean in your hint about crape. I won't have a rag of it in the picture. Do you imagine that I shall be always weeping, like one of Ovid's river goddesses? Mr. M. was a very worthy man; but recollect what King Henry said when tidings came to him of the death of Percy of Northumberland.

ALDERMAN DOWGATE TO

* * *

Made me

Much obliged to you, Sir. Very much obliged to you. quite another man: wish Camomile could do as much: he has soused me with slops till I am as lank as a weazle; but you have put me on my legs again. There's cheeks! there's a calf! there's a perpendicular (I think that's the word) back, and a squeezed-in bread-basket. It reminds me very much of myself, when I walked up to town in the year 1786, only the dress is a little different; no silk stockings, velvet breeches, and powdered periwigs in those days. Talk of fluids, and washes, and paints, and auburn wigs! phoo! You are the boy for be witching 'em. Should not wonder if you got me a second wife! And yet I shall be half ashamed to present it to the Corporation: it's so very young: I shall be quizzed; I know I shall. Well, if they don't choose to take it, they may leave it. I'll give it to my son, Tom. It's just his age, and may pass for him, when I am dead and gone. That will save him the expense of sitting for a new one.

CAPTAIN HOREHOUND TO SIR W. B.

To speak the truth, I don't quite like it. I have no particular objection to make; but it does not sufficiently blend the soldier and the gentleman. The former, indeed, is well enough designated by the scarlet jacket, and the L. H. V. upon the gorget; but there is a sort of a je ne scais quoi wanting to make it look the latter. You tell me that "Portrait of a Gentleman" in the catalogue will set all that smooth. So it would, but I choose to have it printed "Portrait of Candid Horehound, Esquire, a Captain in the Light Horse Volunteers." The L. H. V. would be more technical; but some wag would be translating it Left-handed Volunteers, or some such stupid joke; so I'll have it printed "Light Horse" at length. You have made the left side of the shirt-collar fall over the black stock. Pray correct this, and paint it bolt upright. This will give me a greater air of fashion, and will partly cover the claret-mark on my chin. I don't like having the good qualities of my leg and thigh enveloped in great thick russia duck overalls. Pray daub them out, and dress me in white elastic silk: nothing so well shews the muscles. The shortest way will be to commence de novo, as my uncle Hilary has it. Throw negligently over my capacious shoulders a most beautiful hussar cloak, with an immense quantity of sugar-loaf buttons. I wish I could hit upon a less professional adjective. Give me a pair of polished obdurate boots, reaching half way up the thigh. Place my right foot upon the head of a dead radical; my left upon the mouth of a cannon, which must be in the very act of explosion. Paint a drawn sword beautifully polished in my right-hand, and a cocked pistol, marked "Mortimer," in my left. In the front of my helmet affix a death's head and cross bones, and by all means let the beauty of my countenance be tempered by a valiant severity. I'll have the air red with conflagration. In part of the back-ground let the mob be flying in disorder, clambering over the rails of Finsbury-square, and making the best of their way towards Bishopsgate-street. In another part, let Major Cartwright be seen running up the City-road towards St. Luke's. My faithful negro in the rear must be reining-in a coal-black steed, snorting fire, and tossing his mane and tail into the clouds. Let the horse be rearing in such a way as in his descent must cause his left hoof infallibly to fracture my helmet, and, possibly, my skull. Let my negro appear alarmed at this, but do not let me appear alarmed at all. I wish, or rather my father wishes, that the shop in Chiswell-street may be distinctly visible, with the words "Horehound and Son, Grocers and Tea-dealers," painted in gold letters upon a blue ground over the door. Pray throw in my poor wife in an agony of tears, at the nurserywindow, with the Gazette in her hand, which directs my regiment to muster on the morning of the Coronation at three o'clock. But don't let this appear to give me a moment's uneasiness.

LEVI LAZARUS TO MR. T.

Make it pounds instead of guineas, and you shall have back the frame the moment the exhibition is over.