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A CUSTOM-HOUSE CLERK.

385

ried a Moravian"-at which tirade the customhouse officer stared with a hundred eyes, but on went the now hero of the scene.

"Your little woman, Borrowdale, has been somewhat alarmed at the gambols of her cockatoo-I just started up to quiet the bird, when that damned horned owl--but walk in, Borrowdale, and I'll tell you the whole history;" saying which, he hooked the perplexed placeman by the button, and gently persuaded him into the parlour.

Miss Warren, (the crimson drops trickling from her countenance,) here followed both gentlemen into the apartment, when the comedian perceiving a tray of crockery ready for an afternoon's repast, observed with true Ellistonian solemnity, "And now, Madam, we'll take a cup of your exquisite souchong.

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Borrowdale, who had wit enough to determine the best course which could be pursued, immediately gave both his hearers to understand, he knew the name and person of Miss Warren's unexpected visitor, and wisely suggested some mistake had been the cause of the vexatious contretemps.

The history of the meantime, in which Elliston had been closeted with the spinster, appears to have been this :-He had, of course, arrived, hoping to hear something of "Invisiblina," and Miss Warren rather expecting a visit from a bird-fancier, at about the same time, a most comic equivoque had been the consequence.

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A PARLOUR SCENE.

But Elliston quickly perceiving that both the lady and himself had been the victims of some wicked plot, and suspecting a conspirator might still lie hid in the adjoining chamber, which turned out to be the lady's bed-room, up he jumped, and with little ceremony forced his way into it. As Sir Anthony Absolute observes, he might also have been "a little too lively," (for the lady opposed his progress,) and hence the scream in defence of her honour, which, like a sweetmeat, had been preserved for many a season, since the ripening on the tree.

But now, partly through the ineffable quality of rich comedy, which was so much the constitution of Elliston, and partly from Miss Warren's mulcible nature, which, to do her justice, was unrivalled, and all this aided by the pacific disposition of the clerk of the "long-room," peace was tolerably restored. The perspiration streamed from Miss Warren, like a tinted water-course in the vicinity of a dyer; but Elliston, who mixed up humanity in his revenge, soon beguiled her of her native good humour, and declared that he would not leave the house, nor should Borrowdale quit the room, until tea, toast, and noyeau, had gone the round of the table.

Miss Mellon's employment, in the while, is only to be surmised. Borrowdale made sundry attempts to depart, but the comedian was peremptory, and he could not stir.

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It came ultimately to this,-the whole party sat down to cribbage. Miss Warren having won seven shillings, the birds being covered up for the night, and Elliston having declared over and over again, her nephew the colonel in India was one of his early playmates, she was as happy as a queen.

By this time, Elliston, who had nearly discussed the bottle of noyeau, was dropping off into a comfortable doze, when a slam of the street door startled the little party, and made the very cages rattle on the walls. The servant maid entering a few minutes afterwards, shuffled up to Borrowdale, and in a kind of ludicrous perplexity, whispered, "The lady's agone, sir;" at which, Elliston opened his eyes, and perceiving renewed confusion in poor Borrowdale's manner, exclaimed-"Lady! what Lady? you hussey!"—" Why, the lady what's a been a watching a you, sir, this whole hour."-" What! what!" repeated Elliston, at the same time seizing Borrowdale with one hand, and Miss Warren's turban and curls with the other, (both of which were eradicated by his grasp)" Watching! watching, did you say?

A lady! and gone!-which way?" — saying which, he snatched up his hat, and thrusting the spinster's head gear into his pocket, rushed into the passage. "Which way, wench?" screamed the comedian." Can't a tell, sir," responded the maid -an octave higher; "can't a tell, sir," and in two minutes Elliston was out of sight.

CHAPTER XVI.

The Royal Circus-Rev. Rowland Hill-His addresses—The Pic Nics-Their diversions-Colonel Greville-Theatrical furor-R. C. Sowden-Infamous hand-bill-Captain Caulfield-John Fuller-A fracas-Elliston, Captain Macheath -Dr. Busby-New Prologue to Macbeth-Speech and benefit-Sheridan's appointment-Thomas Sheridan-His letter and remonstrance-Elliston's reply - A Greek poet -Another theatre-Disaster.

THE Royal Circus Theatre, in Blackfriar's-road, having been advertised for lease or sale, early in this year, Elliston, on the 23rd of February, (the day before the fire at Drury,) sent in proposals as a tenant. The terms demanded by the trustees were, for purchase of the remaining term-nine seasons-20,000l., payable in annual sums, or for a lease of six years, 3000l. per annum, the lessee paying ground-rent, taxes, and insurance, amounting to 540l. per annum.

REV. ROWLAND HILL.

389

After a lengthy correspondence on the subject, Elliston became lessee for seven years, at 21007. per annum, being bound under a covenant not to produce any dramatic pieces of an immoral tendency.

When this theatre was in the course of building, the chapel, erected by the Rev. Rowland Hill, in Blackfriar's-road, was in a similar progressive state; but the divine having observed, with some bitterness of spirit, the great advance the theatre was daily making over the chapel-that the one party worked like bees, whilst his own operatives were sluggish as drones-he took an opportunity of pointedly animadverting on the case, in an address to his congregation, at the place where he was preaching in the meantime:

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"There are two ships," said he, of a spice island. One is manned by the elect of heaven, and freighted with good works-the other, directed by the devil's crew, and laden with sinfulness. The object of both these craft, is to reach the spicy port as soon as possible; but the devil's ship, if not a better vessel, is more actively manned, -for to do Satan justice he is always industrious. These fellows are crowding all sail till their shrouds crack again, whilst the good and righteous ship is throwing away a fine wind. Let them only land, and the whole shore will become tainted,-this fine aromatic flavour which invites you now, will become

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