And made the most notorious geck, and gull,
That e'er invention plaid on? tell me, why?
Oli. Alas, Malvolio, this is not my writing,
Though, I confess, much like the character:
But, out of question, 'tis Maria's hand.
And now I do bethink me, it was she

First told me thou wait mad; then cam'ft thou fmiling,
And in fuch forms which here were prefuppos'd*
Upon thee in the letter: pr'ythee, be content;
This practice hath most fhrewdly pafs'd upon thee:
But when we know the grounds and authors of it,
Thou shalt be both the plaintiff and the judge
Of thine own cause.

Fab. Good Madam, hear me speak;

And let no quarrel, nor no brawl to come,
Taint the condition of this present hour,
Which I have wondred at. In hope it shall not,
Moft freely I confefs, myself and Sir Toby
Set this device against Malvolio here,
Upon fome stubborn and uncourteous parts
We had conceiv'd against him. Maria writ
The letter, at Sir Toby's great importance;
In recompence whereof he hath married her.
How with a sportful malice it was follow'd,
May rather pluck on laughter than revenge,
If that the injuries be justly weigh'd,
That have on both fides pafs'd.

Oli. Alas, poor fool! how have they baffled thee! Clo. Why, fome are born great, fome atchieve greatnefs, and fome have greatness thrust upon them. I was one, Sir, in this interlude; one Sir Topas, Sir; but that's all one-by the Lord, fool, I am not mad; but do you remember, Madam,—why laugh you at fuch a barren rafcal? an you smile not, he's gagg'd: and thus the whirlgigg of time brings in his revenges.

Mal. I'll be reveng'd on the whole pack of you.

[Exit.

Oli. He hath been moft notoriously abus'd.
Duke. Purfue him, and intreat him to a peace:

He hath not told us of the captain yet;

• Prefuppos'd for impofed

When that is known, and golden time convents,
A folemn combination fhall be made

Of our dear fouls. Mean time, fweet fifter,
We will not part from hence.-Cefario, come;
(For fo you shall be while you are a man);
But when in other habits you are feen,
Orfino's miftrefs, and his fancy's queen.

Clown fings.

*When that I was a little tiny boy,

With hey, ho, the wind and the rain:
A foolish thing was but a toy,

For the rain it raineth every day.

But when I came to man's eftate,

With hey, ho, &c.

[Exeunt.

"Gainft knaves and thieves men shut their gate,

For the rain, &c.

But when I came, alas! to wive,

With hey, ho, &c.

By fwaggering could I never thrive,
For the rain, &c.

But when I came unto my beds,
With hey, hò, &c.

With tofs-pots ftill had drunken heads,
For the rain, &c.

A great while ago the world begun,
With hey, ho, &c.

'But that's all one, our play is done;
And we'll ftrive to please you every day.

This

[Exit.

poor ftuff appears to be the players, not Shakespear's.

Enter the Duke of Ephefus, Egeon, Jailor, and other Attendants.

Ægeon.

P

ROCEED, Salinus, to procure my fall,

And by the doom of death end woes and all.

Duke,

Duke. Merchant of Syracufe, plead no more;
I am not partial to infringe our laws :
The enmity, and discord, which of late
Sprung from the ranc'rous outrage of your
To merchants, our well-dealing countrymen,
(Who, wanting gilders to redeem their lives,
Have feal'd his rigorous ftatutes with their bloods),
Excludes all pity from our threat'ning looks.
For, fince the mortal and inteftine jars

The plot taken from the Menach mi of Plautus.

"Twixt thy feditious countrymen and us,
It hath in folemn fynods been decreed,
Both by the Syracufans and ourselves,
T'admit no traffic to our adverfe towns;
Nay, more, if any born at Ephefus
Be feen at Syracufan marts and fairs;
Again, if any Syracufan born.

Come to the bay of Ephefus, he dies:
His goods confifcate to the Duke's difpofe,
Unless a thousand marks be levied

To quit the penalty, and ranfom him.
Thy fubftance, valu'd at the highest rate,
Cannot amount unto a hundred marks;
Therefore, by law thou art condemn'd to die.
Egeon. Yet this my comfort, when your words are
done,

My woes end likewife with the evening-fun.

Duke. Well, Syracufan, fay, in brief, the cause,
Why thou departed'ft from thy native home;
And for what cause thou cam'ft to Ephefus.

Egeon. A heavier tafk could not have been impos'd Than I to speak my grief unfpeakable:

Yet that the world may witnefs, that my end
Was wrought by nature *, not by vile offence,
I'll utter what my forrow gives me leave.
In Syracufa was I born, and wed

Unto a woman, happy but for me;

And by me too, had not our hap been bad :
With her I liv'd in joy; our wealth increas'd,
By profperous voyages I often made
To Epidamnum; till my factor's death,
And the great care of goods at random left,
Drew me from kind embracements of my spouse;
From whom my absence was not fix months old,
Before herself (almoft at fainting under
The pleafing punishment that women bear)
Had made provifion for her following me,
And foon, and fafe, arrived where I was.
There she had not been long, but she became
A joyful mother of two goodly fons ;

And, which was ftrange, the one fo like the other,

i.. by a natural event, by the course of providence.

As could not be diftinguish'd but by names.
That very hour, and in the felf-fame inn,
A poor mean woman was delivered

Of fuch a burthen, male twins both alike:
Thofe (for the parents were exceeding poor)
I bought, and brought up to attend my fons.
My wife, not meanly proud of two fuch boys,
Made daily motions for our home-return:
Unwilling, I agreed; alas, too soon!
We came aboard.

A league from Epidamnum had we fail'd,
Before the always wind-obeying deep
Gave any tragic inftance of our ham;
But longer did we not retain much hope:
For what obfcured light the heav'ns did grant,
Did but convey-unto our fearful minds
A doubtful warrant of immediate death;
Which tho' myfelf would gladly have embrac'd,
Yet the inceffant weeping of my wife,

(Weeping before, for what fhe faw muft come),
And piteous plainings of the pretty babes,
That mourn'd for fashion, ignorant what to fear,
Forc'd me to feek delays for them and me.
And this it was; (for other means were none).
The failors fought for fafety by our boat,
And left the fhip, then finking-ripe, to us;
My wife, more careful for the elder born,
Had faften'd him unto a small spare maft,
Such as feafaring men provide for storms;
To him one of the other twins was bound,
Whilft I had been like heedful of the other.
The children thus difpos'd, my wife and I,
Fixing our eyes on whom our care was fix'd,
Faften'd ourselves at either end the maft;
And floating ftraight, obedient to the ftream,
Were carry'd towards Corinth, as we thought.
At length the fun, gazing upon the earth,
Difpers'd thofe vapours that offended us;
And, by the benefit of his wifh'd light,
The feas wax'd calm; and we difcover'd
Two fhips from far making amain to us,
Of Corinth that, of Epidaurus this ;