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March oe'r the ruin'd plain with motion slow,
Stoop not to int’rest, flattery, or deceit;
esteem. Madness like this no fancy ever seized, Still to be cheated, never to be pleased; Since one false beam of joy in sickly minds Is all the poor content delusion finds. There thy enchantment broke, and from this hour I here renounce thy visionary pow'r; And since thy essence on my breath depends, Thus with a puff the whole delusion ends.
WRITTEN IN A LADY'S IVORY TABLE
Scrawl'd o'er with trifles thus, and quite
MRS. FRANCES HARRIS'S PETITION. 1700. To their excellencies the Lords Justices of Ire
The humble petition of Frances Harris,
Lady Betty's † chamber, because I was cold; And I had in a purse seven pounds, four shillings,
and six-pence, besides farthings, in money
and gold; So because I had been buying things for my lady
last night, I was resolved to tell my inoney, to see if it was
right. Now, you must know, because my trunk has a
า very bad lock, Therefore all the money I have, which, God
knows, is a very small stock, I keep in my pocket, tied about my middle, next
So when I went to put up my purse, as God would
have it, my smock was unripp’d, And instead of putting it into my pocket, down it
slipp'd; Then the bell rung, and I went down to put my
lady to bed !; And, God knows, I thought my money was as
maidenhead. So, when I came up again, I found my pocket
feel very light; But when I search’d, and miss'd my purse, Lord !
I thought I should have sunk outright. * The earls of Berkely and of Galway. H. Lady Betty Berkely, afterwards Germain. H.
safe as my
“ Lord ! madam,” says Mary, “how d’ye do?”–
“ Indeed,” says I, “never worse : But pray, Mary, can you tell what I have done
with my purse ?" “ Lord help me!” says Mary, "I never stirr'd
out of this place !" Nay,” said I, “I had it in lady Betty's cham
ber, that's a plain case.” So Mary got me to bed, and cover'd me up warm: However, she stole away my garters, that I might
do myself no harm. So I tumbled and toss'd all night, as you may very
well think, But hardly ever set my eyes together, or slept a
wink. So I was a dream’d, methought, that we went and
search'd the folks round, And in a corner of Mrs. Dukes's* box, tied in a
rag, the money was found. So next morning we told Whittlet, and he fell a
my dame Wadgarfcame; and she, you know,
is thick of hearing. " Dame,” said I, as loud as I could bawl, “ do you
know what a loss I have had ?" Nay,” said she, “my lord Colway's § folks are all very sad :
lord Dromedary|comes a Tuesday without fail.”
* Wife to one of the footmen. H. + Earl of Berkeley's valet. H.
The old deaf housekeeper. H. Galway. H.
|| The Earl of Drogheda, who with the primate was to succeed the two earls. H, VOL. XVI.
"Pugh!" said I, “but that's not the business
that I ail." Says Cary,* says he, “I have been a servant this
five and twenty years, come spring, And in all the places I liv'd I never heard of such a thing.”
says the steward, † “I remember when I was at my lady Shrewsbury's, Such a thing as this happen'd, just about the time
of gooseberries.” So I went to the party suspected, and I found her
full of grief: (Now, you must know, of all things in the world,
I hate a thief:) However, I was resolv'd to bring the discourse
slily about: “ Mrs. Dukes,” said I, “here's an ugly accident
has happen'd out: 'Tis not that I value the money three skips of a
louse ; But the thing I stand upon is the credit of the
house. 'Tistrue,seven pounds, four shillings, and sixpence,
makes a great hole in my wages: Besides, as they say, service is no inheritance in
Now, Mrs. Dukes, you know, and every body un
derstands, That though 'tis hard to judge, yet money can't
go without hands.”
* Clerk of the kitchen. H. + Ferris; of whom, see Journal to Stella, Dec. 21, 1710. N.
A usual saying of hers. H.