The sexton shall green sods on thee bestow; Alas, the sexton is thy banker now! A dismal banker must that banker be, EPITAPH ON THE SAME. BENEATH this verdant hilloc lies YOU always are making a God of your Spouse; But this neither Reason nor Conscience allows : VERSES, WRITTEN ON A WINDOW, AT THE DEANERY HOUSE, ST. PATRICK'S. ARE the guests of this house still doom'd to be cheated? Sure the Fates have decreed they by halves should be treated. In the days of good John,* if you came here to dine, You had choice of good meat, but no choice of good wine. In Jonathan's reign, if you came here to eat, You have choice of good wine, but no choice of good meat. O Jove! then how fully might all sides be blest, Would'st thou but agree to this humble request! Put both deans in one; or, if that's too much trouble, Instead of the deans, make the deanery double. ON ANOTHER WINDOW.† A BARD, on whom Phoebus his spirit bestow'd, Resolving t' acknowledge the bounty he ow'd, Found out a new method at once of confessing, And making the most of so mighty a blessing: To the God he'd be grateful; but mortals he'd chouse, By making his patron preside in his house; * Dr. Sterne, the predecessor of Swift in the deanery of St. Patrick's, and afterward bishop of Clogher, was distinguished for his hospitality. F. †These lines were written by Dr. Delany, in conjunction with Stella, and preceded those which here follow them. N. And And wisely foresaw this advantage from thence, That the God would in honour bear most of th' expense: So the bard he finds drink, and leaves Phoebus to treat With the thoughts he inspires, regardless of meat. Hence they that come hither expecting to‘dine, Are always fobb'd off with sheer wit and sheer wine. APOLLO TO THE DEAN. 1720.* RIGHT trusty, and so forth- we let you to know We are very ill us'd by you mortals below. Without whom they could get neither claret nor beef: Yet their wine and their victuals those curmudgeon lubbards Lock up from my sight in cellars and cupboards. That I have an ill eye, they wickedly think, And taint all their meat and sour all their drink. But, thirdly and lastly, it must be allow 'd, I alone can inspire the poetical crowd : * See the following poem occasioned by this, called "News from Parnassus," writen by Dr. Delany. N. This is gratefully own'd by each boy in the college, Whom if I inspire, it is not to my knowledge. This every pretender to rhyme will admit, Without troubling his head about judgment or wit. These gentlemen use me with kindness and freedom, And as for their works, when I please I may read 'em. They lie open on purpose on counters and stalls, And by the description I certainly know, That That some verses were writ with felonious intent, Direct to the north, where I never yet went : That the letters appear'd revers'd through the pane, But in Stella's bright eyes they were plac'd right again: Wherein she distinctly could read every line, In all parts of the globe where your language is read. He knows very well, I ne'er gave a refusal, When he ask'd for my aid in the forms that are usual: But the secret is this; I did lately intend P 4 And |