have told you and ye

did not hear, wherefore

will ye hear it again."

more."

be

Why will you stricken any more, ye will revolt more and I could not conceal my anxiety of mind, although I endeavoured to do it, as much as possible, by retirement and silence; but my most intimate religious friends would discover it.

I became more industrious, and exercised myself a great deal. One day I went early into the field, to plough it free from stumps and stones. Soon after I started, this text weighed heavily on my mind: "Warn the people, or their blood will I require at your hands." The pangs which afflicted me so heavily, that, although it rained plentifully, I was insensible of it. Paul's expressions took such hold of my thoughts, that I regarded not what I was about. "If I do this wil lingly, I have my reward, but if not a dispensation of the gospel is committed unto me." "Necessity is laid upon me, woe is me if I preach not the gospel." One objection more arose in my mind; that providence was

against it, and God's spirit and providence generally accorded. If the church should call me, and I could extricate myself from my worldly concerns, I should devote myself to the duty of the ministery.

About this time, Mr. Eaton came to see and converse with me. He took an opportunity, privately, to inform me, that he had for a long time observed an appearance of my mind being much depressed. That he thought it his duty to enquire, and mine to divulge, what it was; whether he or the church, had done any thing to make me dissatisfied. I told him, I had no reason to complain; what was between God and my own soul, I did not wish to disclose to any person whatever. I was, however, constrained to give him some account, for which I was afterwards very sorry, although he gave me tender and faithful advice. The next church meeting, he called me aside, and told me he thought it his duty to mention me to the church; and if they thought proper to examine me, he would be satisfied. I begged him to desist for that

time. He replied it was his duty, and he should do it. I found great reluctance in this procedure. They examined me, gave me a text, and appointed a time for me to preach before the church. They left it to me, that, if, after I had preached, I chose to devote my time to study, they would submit to it; other. wise, they should continue my trials. dence opened the way, and, in a short time after, I went to studying, in which I continued some years, and sincerely felt as if I was in the performance of my duty.

Provi

Although my studies were dry, yet I had intervals of much spiritual comfort. One or two instances I must mention. My appli cation to study was close, and the change of life from an industrious and stirring, to a sedentary one, probably was the cause of a severe fit of sickness. I had a high fever and was in much pain of body; but the pain of mind, for some time, so far exceeded it, and being exhausted by weakness, that I was tempted to think, if I was in my duty, I should not be impeded by Providence. The

conflict was severe for some time; but through the grace of God, I had such establishing views of an interest in Christ, the well ordered covenant of grace, and the doctrines and promises of the gospel, that I supposed my soul was fixed firm on that eternal rock.

After my recovery, I prosecuted my stu dies, and used more exercise. The gentleman, under whom I studied, was a Presbyterian minister, from the State of Connecticut. He had, at that time, a number of youth studying the classics. The class to which I belonged were studying the Greek Testament reading that chapter in John where Christ told Peter," he that is washed needeth not, save to wash his feet, but is clean every whit" and although it was not my verse to read, the master stopped the scholar, and turned to me, and said" as we think differently of baptism, do you not think that these words suggest strongly, that a little water is as well as a great deal." I replied, that they were as much in favour of sprinkling, as any in the bible. This abrupt answer,

D

caused him to order the class back to their studies; but he detained me, to reason with me. I instantly made a confession, that I had been inadvertent, and that for all his liberal treatment to me he deserved a more submissive reply. He still persisted, and told me my arguments were weak. I replied, that I was not on an equal footing with him, I had been an aggressor, I was his pupil, and was afraid he felt injured at my offence, and wished him to pass it over as a piece of inadvertency. He still insisted, and promised, that in the debate, he would allow me to be on an equal footing with himself. As I could not avoid it, we were closely engaged till night. In the morning, when I went to school, he handed me this thesis: "That which God has once commanded, and never forbidden, remains a duty, and cannot be sinful." I saw, that it alluded to children's being taken into the Jewish church with their parents. I wished to avoid any further debate. I asked till noon to fill up the thesis-and filled it thus: "But God has commanded the seventh day as a Sabbath, and never forbidden it, and therefore it remains a duty