And handled his new pair of whiskers so

rough,

That before all the courtiers I fear'd they'd come off,

And then, Lord, how GERAMB would triumphantly scoff!

Mem.-to buy for son DICKY some unguent or lotion

To nourish his whiskers-sure road to promo

tion !*

Saturday.

Last night a Concert-vastly Gay-
Given by Lady C-STL-R-GH.
My Lord loves music, and, we know,
Has two strings always to his bow.
In choosing songs, the R-G-T nam'd
"Had I heart for falsehood fram'd."
While gentle II-ATF-D begg'd and pray'd
For "Young am and sore afraid."

EPIGRAM.†

WHAT new, to-day?" Oh! worse and worse, Mc is the PR- -E's Privy Purse!"

England is not the only country, where merit of this kind is noticed and rewarded. "I remember," says Tavernier, " to have seen one of the King of Persia's porters, whose mustaches were so long that he could tie them behind his neck, for which reason he had a double pension."

†This is a bon-mot, attributed, I know not how truly, to the Pr-c-ss of W-es. I have merely versified it.

The PR-E's Purse! no, no, you fool,
You mean the PR--CE's Ridicule!

KING CRACK* AND HIS IDOLS.

WRITTEN AFTER THE LATE NEGOCIATION FOR A NEW M-N-STRY.

KING CRACK was the best of all possible Kings, (At least, so his Courtiers would swear to

gladly.)

you

But CRACK now and then would be'trodox things,

And, at last, took to worshipping Images sadly.

Some broken-down IDOLS, that long had been

In

plac'd

father's old Cabinet, pleas'd him so

much,

That he knelt down and worshipp'd, thoughsuch was his taste!

They were monstrous to look at and rotten to touch!

*One of those antediluvian Princes, with whom Manetho and Whiston seem so intimately acquainted. If we had the Memoirs of Thoth, from which Manetho compiled his History, we should find, I dare say, that Crack was only a Regent, and that he, perhaps, succeeded Typhon, who (as Whiston says) was the last King of the Antediluvian Dynasty.

And these were the beautiful gods of KING

CRACK!

Till his People, disdaining to worship such

things,

Cried aloud, one and all, “Come, your God"ships must pack

"You will not do for us, though you may do "for Kings."

Then, trampling the gross IDOLS under their feet,

They sent CRACK a petition, beginning "Great Cæsar!

"We are willing to worship; but only entreat "That you'll find us some decenter Godheads than these are."

Pl try" says KING CRACK-then they furnisa'd him models

Cr boter shap'd Gods, but he sent them all

bak;

Some wore chisel'd too fine, some heads 'stead of noddles,

Ju short, they were all much too godlike for CRACK!

to his darling old IDOLS again, ast mending their legs and new bronztheir faces,

Infiance of Gods and of men,

Le monsters up grinning once more in

WHAT'S MY THOUGHT LIKE?

Quest. WHY is a pump like V-SC-NT C—s

TL-R-GH?

Answ. Because it is a slender thing of wood, That up and down its awkward arm doth

sway,

And coolly spout and spout and spout away, In one weak, washy, everlasting flood!

EPIGRAM.

DIALOGUE BETWEEN A CATHOLIC DELEGATE AND HIS R-Y-L H-GHN-SS THE

D-E OF C-B-L-D.

SAID his Highness to NED, with that grim face of his,

"Why refuse us the Veto dear Catholic "NEDDY!??___

"Because, Sir," said NED, looking full in his phiz,

"You're forbidding enough, in all conscience "already!"

WREATHS FOR THE MINISTERS.

AN ANACREONTIC.

HITHER, FLORA, Queen of flowers! Haste thee from Old Brompton's bowers--Or, (if sweeter that abode)

From the King's well-odour'd Road,
Where each little nursery bud
Breathes the dust and quaffs the mud !
Hither come, and gaily twine

Brightest herbs and flowers of thine
Into wreaths for those who rule us,
Those who rule and (some say) fool us--
FLORA, sure, will love to please
England's HOUSEHOLD DEITIES!*
First you must then, willy-nilly,
Fetch me many an orange lily-
Orange of the darkest dye
Irish G-FF-RD can supply!
Choose me out the longest sprig,
And stick it in old ELD-N's wig!

Find me next a Poppy posy,
Type of his harangues so dozy,
Garland gaudy, dull and cool,
For the head of L-v-RP —L !—
"Twill console his brilliant brows
For that loss of laurel boughs,
Which they suffer'd (what a pity!)
On the road to Paris city.

Next, our C--STL-R-GH to crown,
Bring me, from the County Down,

The ancients, in like manner, crowned their Lares, or Household Gods, See Juvenal, Sat. 9. v. 133.-Plutarch too tells us that Household Gods were then, as they are now, "much given to War and penal Statues.” ριννυωδεις και ποινιμες δαίμονας.