Sir A. Sir, the lady shall be as ugly as I choose; she shall have a hump on each shoulder; she shall be as crooked as the crescent; her one eye shall roll like the bull's in Cox's Museum; she shall have a skin like a mummy, and the beard of a Jew ; she shall be all this, sir! Yet, I'll make you ogle her all day, and sit up all night to write sonnets on her beauty! Capt. A. This is reason and moderation, indeed!

Sir A. None of your sneering, puppy!-no grinning, jackanapes!

Capt. A. Indeed, sir, I never was in a worse humor for mirth in my life.

Sir A. 'Tis false, sir! I know you are laughing in your sleeve. I know you'll grin when I am gone, sir!

Capt. A. Sir, I hope I know my duty better.

Sir A. None of your passion, sir! none of your violence, if you please! It won't do with me, I promise you.

Capt. A. Indeed, sir, I never was cooler in my life.

Sir A. I know you are in a passion in your heart; I know you are, you hypocritical young dog! But it won't do! Capt. A. Nay, sir, upon my word Sir A. So you will fly out! Can't you be cool, like me? What good can passion do? Passion is of no service, you impudent, insolent, overbearing reprobate! There, you sneer again! Don't provoke me! But you rely upon the mildness of my temper, you do, you dog! You play upon the meekness of my disposition! Yet, take care; the patience of a saint may be overcome at last! But, mark! I give you six hours and a half to consider of this: if you then agree without any condition, to do everything on earth that I choose, why, I may, in time, forgive you. If not, don't enter the same hemisphere with me; don't dare to breathe the same air, or use the same light, with me; but get an atmosphere and a sun of your own! I'll strip you of your commission; I'll lodge a five-and-three-pence in the hands of trustees, and you shall live on the interest! I'll disown you. I'll disinherit you! I'll never call you Jack again. [Exit.]

Capt. A. Mild, gentle, considerate father! I kiss your hand.

R. B. Sheridan.

ROLLA.

CCCLXXXII.

ROLLA AND ALONZO.

[Enter ROLLA disguised as a Monk.]

OLLA. Inform me, friend, is Alonzo, the Peruvian, confined in this dungeon?

Sentinel. He is.

Rolla. I must speak with him.

Sentinel. You must not.

Rolla. He is my friend.

Sentinel. Not if he were your brother.
Rolla. What is to be his fate?

Sentinel. He dies at sunrise.

Rolla. Ha! then I am come in time,
Sentinel. Just to witness his death.

Rolla. [Advancing toward the door.] Soldier, I must speak with him.

Sentinel. [Pushing him back with his gun.] Back! back! it is impossible.

Rolla. I do entreat you, but for one moment.

Sentinel. You entreat in vain, my orders are most strict.

Rolla. Look on this massive wedge of gold! look on these precious gems! In thy land they will be wealth for thee and thine, beyond thy hope or wish. Take them; they are thine; let me but pass one moment with Alonzo.

Sentinel. Away! Would'st thou corrupt me?.

Castilian! I know my duty better.

Sentinel. I have.

Rolla. Soldier, hast thou a wife?

Rolla. Hast thou children?

Sentinel. Four honest, lovely boys.

me, an old

Rolla. Where didst thou leave them?

Sentinel. In my native village, in the very cot where I was

born.

Rolla. Dost thou love thy wife and children?
Rolla. Do I love them? God knows my heart,

Rolla. Soldier, imagine thou wert doomed to die a cruel death, in a strange land, what would be thy last request?

Sentinel. That some of my comrades should carry my dying blessing to my wife and children.

Rolla. What if that comrade was at thy prison door, and should there be told, "Thy fellow-soldier dies at sunrise, yet thou shalt not for a moment see him, nor shalt thou bear his dying blessing to his poor children, or his wretched wife!' What would'st thou think of him who thus could drive thy comrade from the door?

Sentinel. How !

Rolla. Alonzo has a wife and child; and I am come but to receive for her, and for her poor babe, the last blessing of my friend.

Sentinel. Go in.

Go in. [Exit Sentinel.]

Rolla. [Calls] Alonzo! Alonzo!

[Enter Alonzo, speaking as he comes in.]

Alonzo. How is my hour elapsed? Well, I am ready.
Rolla. Alonzo, - know me!

Alonzo. Rolla! Heavens! how didst thou pass the guard? Rolla. There is not a moment to be lost in words. This disguise I tore from the dead body of a friar, as I passed our field of battle. It has gained me entrance to thy dungeon; now, take it thou, and fly.

me.

Alonzo. And Rolla,

Rolla. Will remain here in thy place.

Alonzo. And die for me! No! Rather eternal torture rack

Rolla. I shall not die, Alonzo. It is thy life Pizarro seeks, not Rolla's; and thy arm may soon deliver me from prison. Or, should it be otherwise, I am as a blighted tree in the desert; nothing lives beneath my shelter. Thou art a husband and a father; the being of a lovely wife and helpless infant depend upon thy life. Go, go, Alonzo, not to save thyself, but Cora

Alonzo. Urge me not thus, my friend. I am prepared to die in peace.

Rolla. To die in peace! devoting her you have sworn to live for, to madness, misery, and death!

Alonzo. Merciful Heavens !

Rolla. If thou art yet irresolute, Alonzo, now mark me

well. Thou knowest that Rolla never pledged his word, and shrank from its fulfilment. And here I swear, if thou art proudly obstinate, thou shalt have the desperate triumph of seeing Rolla perish by thy side.

Alonzo. O, Rolla! you distract me! Wear you the robe: and though dreadful the necessity, we will strike down the guard and force our passage.

Rolla. What, the soldier on duty here?

Alonzo. Yes, else, seeing two, the alarm will be instant death.

Rolla. For my nation's safety, I would not harm him. That soldier, mark me, is a man! All are not men that wear the human form. He refused my prayers, refused my gold, refused to admit, — till his own feelings bribed him. I will not risk a hair of that man's head, to save my heartstrings from consuming fire. But haste! A moment's further pause, and all is lost.

Alonzo. Rolla, I fear thy friendship drives me from honor and from right.

Rolla. Did Rolla ever counsel dishonor to his friend? [Throwing the friar's garment over his shoulder.] There! conceal thy face. Now, God be with thee!

R. B. Sheridan.

CCCLXXXIII.

TE

THE ENGLISH TRAVELLER.

RAVELLER. Do you belong to this house, friend? Landlord. No, it belongs to me, I guess. [The Trav eller takes out his memorandum-book, and in a low voice read: what he writes.]

Trav. "Mem. Yankee landlords do not belong to their houses." [Aloud.] You seem young for a landlord: may I ask how old you are?

Land. Yes, if you'd like to know.

Trav. Hem! [Disconcerted.] Are you a native, sir?

Land. No, sir; there are no natives hereabouts.

Trav. "Mem. None of the inhabitants natives; ergo, all foreigners." [Aloud.] Where were you born, sir?

Land. Do you know where Marblehead is?

Trav. Yes.

Land. Well, I was not born there.

Trav. Why did you ask the question, then?
Land. Because my daddy was.

Trav. But you were born somewhere.

Land. That's true; but as father moved up country afore the townships were marked out, my case is somewhat like the Indian's who was born at Nantucket, Cape Cod, and all along

shore.

Trav. Were you brought up in this place, sir?

Land. No; I was raised in Varmount till mother died, and then, as father was good for nothing after that, I pulled up stakes and went to sea a bit.

Trav. "Mem. Yankees, instead of putting up gravestones, pull up stakes, and go to sea, when a parent dies." [Aloud.] You did not follow the sea long, for you have not the air of a mariner.

Land. Why, you see, I had a leetle knack at the coopering business; and larning that them folks that carry it on in the West Indies die off fast, I calculated I should stand a chance to get a handsome living there.

Trav. And so you turned sailor to get there?

Land. Not exactly; for I agreed to work my passage by cooking for the crew, and tending the dumb critters.

Trav. Dumb critters! Of what was your lading composed? Land. A leetle of everything; - horses, hogs, hoop-poles, and Hingham boxes; boards, ingyons, soap, candles, and ile. Trav. "Mem. Soap, candles, and ile, called dumb critters by the Yankees." [Aloud.] Did you arrive there safely? Land. No, I guess we did n't.

Trav. Why not?

Land. We had a fair wind, and sailed a pretty piece, I tell you; but jest afore we reached the eend of our vige, some pirates overhauled us, and stole all our molasses, rum, and gingerbread.

Trav. Is that all they did to you?

Land. No, they ordered us on board their vessel, and promised us some black-strap.

Trav. "Mem. Pirates catch Yankees with a black-strap." [Aloud.] Did you accept the invitation?