ments.

Lady. Your lodgings!-furely I'm not deceiv'd.-Pray, fir, whofe room is this? Ap-Hazard. Mine, ma'am-thefe are my apartIn the next room there lodges a dashing young baronet: nobody knows his name; becaufe he is fo afraid of being tap'd on the shoulder, that he has'nt ftir'd out fince he came.-Over head is an old lady, who is all day fencing-underneath is a young one learning to play on the trumpet-in the the garret is a fpouting authorand over him is a nightly concert of mewing caterwauling lovers.

Lady. Sir, anfwer me this queftion-is the miftrefs of this house a relation of Sir Bamber's?

Ap-Hazard. No, to be fure fhe is'nt-hang it, she may though; for now I recollect, I've feen her roll up butter of her own making in manufcripts of his writing.Well, it's too late for Mifs Union now; no doubt fhe has given me up; and fince you've been the cause of my disappointing one dear creature, make me amends by allowing me to make love to a dearer-one kifsLady. Don't come near me, fir!

Ap-Hazard. I thought you'd prove a lucky ftar, and you have my heart forbodes fuch a fcene of good fortune-(offers to kifs her)nay, if I don't behave like a gentleman, may I never turn up an honour as long as I live!

Lady. Keep off, I infift, fir!-Is this your generosity! Oh, Sir Charles Danvers!-Sir Charles Danvers!-what mifery has our union entailed upon me! what have I fuffered by forming an alliance, without confidering whether there was fortune or affection to fupport it.

Ap-Hazard. Sir Charles Danvers !—pooh !—I don't care that for him: I've turn'd him out of

one

one house already; and if he were here at this moment, I'd fay to him

Enter SIR CHARLES DANVERS.

Sir Charles. Well, fir!-what would you fay to him?

Ap-Hazard. What's to pay?-Nothing more, upon my word.

Sir Charles. Being in the next room, and hearing my name, I came to fee who utter'd itLady Danvers!-alone-and in the apartments of my enemy!What! because he has fupplanted me in my uncle's affections, does he rival me in yours?—because he is heir to a large fortune, is he more worthy your regard, than a ruin'd, loft, unhappy husband? -Speak!

Lady. Sir Charles, your former good opinion I do not wish to forfeit; and if not lov'd, I cannot bear to be defpis'd. I have been betray'd here: first, by the artifices of Mifs Union and Orville; and next, by the treachery of your uncle and his friend. This is my juftification: and now judge, whether he can atone for the lofs of a husband, who till this hour I honour'd and esteem'd.

Sir Charles. Hear me, fir!-What ill intentions urg'd you to attempt fuch daring villainy?

Ap-Hazard. Ill luck, not ill intentions, I affure you, fir.-A woman never led me into a fcrape before and I thought by sticking clofe to an angel, to keep the devil at an agreeable distance. -But I fee Love as well as Fortune makes a fool of me-they're both blind to my merits and fo good-night.

Sir Charles. Hold, fir!-ftir not a step!Lady Danvers, misfortune, not hatred, parted us;

and with my life I'll guard you from your ene mies-Give me your hand-Ah! you once gave it me

Lady. I did: and if it be worth keeping, take it again, Sir Charles. I've bought experience fince you left me; and I feel a pleasure in declaring, that were I fingle to-morrow, there is but one man on earth fhould have my hand and heart -and that one, is Sir Charles Danvers.

Sir Charles. Is it poffible?-You tranfport me! Ap-Hazard. So fhe did me juft now.Take care, my fine fellow-take care!-A man never has a cup-full of joy in one hand, but prefently pops a pail-full of forrow in the other.

Lady. I'll make one more appeal to my mother; I have now a new tale to unfold to her: and if we can but convince her, and your uncle, of Mifs Union's duplicity, we may be happy ftill.- -Why that figh, Sir Charles?

Sir Charles. My debts have fallen into other hands old Colonel Orville is dead: and my greatest foe is now my chief creditor.-Orville is determined to throw me into prifon and on his account I was driven to thofe rooms; for which I have now reafon to thank him; fince this interview has prov'd, my Juliana, that though divided by neceffity, we're ftill united by dearer ties than matrimonial bonds-by mutual inclination-by difinterefted love.

Lady. We are: and, but for our enemies, Sir Charles

Sir Charles. Ay: but for them!-'Sdeath! when I think how you have been treated! However, let me lofe no time in conducting you to your mother's. I'll make at least one example amongst themAnd you, fir mark me, fir!

wait till I return; and then be prepared to give me fuch fatisfaction as the honour of an injur'd husband demands ! [Exit with Lady Danvers.

Ap-Hazard. An injur'd hufband demands !very well-fire away, gentlemen!-if I had ten thousand lives, I dare fay you'd take them allthey shan't, though—(draws a chair and fits in it) -Here I perch for life!-from this chair I never ftir-here I'll wrap myfelf up like an owl in an old tree, and then-let the tempest bellow round me-Heigho! (looks at the wine on the table) I fhould like to drink a glass of wine to raise my fpirits!(gets half up)--Nc-I won't budge-if I ftir, I know I fhall tread on that infernal piece of orange peel, flip down, and break my neck!-Plague on't-will there never come a turn in my favour?-will Fortune never-I'll fit crofs'd leg'd for luck-Ha!-I have it-if my pocket-book. is'nt ftolen, there's a bill of my father's in it now due-here it is!-I'll touch the cafh directly-fet off for Wales to night-leave thefe Cocknies to fight it out by themselves-laugh at having trick'd them, and fo-(as be is going enter Mifs Union.)

Mifs Union. And fo---make appointments with one lady, only to keep them with another !---let me bite my fingers for two hours, and be the whole time fighing here with Lady Danvers !--What have you got there? a lift of affignations I fuppofe---(Snatches the pocket-book from him)---I'll teach you how to keep them! there !---(tears leaves out of the book, note, &c.)

Ap-Hazard. You've torn my father's note! O Lord! What's to pay?

Mifs Union. (Knock at the door) Mercy! who's here?

Enter a SERVANT.

Servant. Sir Charles Danvers has just fent, fir; to defire you'll follow him to Hyde Park, and bring piftols with you, directly.

[Exit. Ap-Hazard. I'll come. Now I can get rid of this plague---and if I go near the Park---Oh! I'll flip thro' all their fingers yet.

Enter another SERVANT.

Servant. Mr. Orville and his fecond are at the door in a post-chaife, fir--and he fwears, if you don't instantly set out for Hamburgh, he'll poft you for a coward.

Ap-Hazard. It never rains but it pours.

Enter another SERVANT.

[Exit.

Servant. Mrs. Seymour, and Sir Bamber Blackletter, fir---they fay you have carried off Lady Danvers, and if you don't inftantly reftore her to her mother, your life muft anfwer for the confequences.

Ap-Hazard. Very well :---fhew them up---only fay, my life is befpoke by fo many people, that if they don't make hafte, I fhan't have a bit of flesh left to peck at---(Servant exit.)---this is the crifis!

Mifs Union. Heavens !---if they should find me here ---Mr. Ap Hazard---my dear Mr. Ap-Hazard---only get me out of this fcrape- -- Where fhall I hide myself!

Ap-Hazard. (in a reverie)---In a brass-mine ;--for me---I'll confult the ftars.

Mifs Union. Confult the ftars, and let me be discover'd---here they come, and I know they'll fearch every hole and corner to find Lady Dan

5

vers!