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Flush. Yours too !—'Sdeath, Sir Paul-this facing has turned
brain. Sir Paul. Racing !--I've done with it, firI hate it-I'm above the turf now.
Flush. Above the turf!--I wish you were under it!- do you pretend the loves both our fons ?two men at the same time, fir?
Sir Paul. To be sure-she's not the first woman that has lov'd twenty at the same time, fir—but as she can't marry without our joint consent, and is now in great distress at Lady Sarah Savage's public breakfast, let's adjourn there directly.
Flush. With all my heart-I can afford it Public breakfast!-why this is later than usual(Looking at his watch.)—Nine o'clock at night!
Sir Paul. Ah, these are late hours! but what need we care, Mr. Flush?—we that have health, youth, spirits—do you know there is only one house in England that affects my conftitution?
Flush. And what house is that?
Sir Paul. (Whispers him.) I never was there but twice-the first time there was a motion about relieving poor insolvent debtors, and the house was so empty I got an ague.
The next time, somebody mov’d to remove the hackney coaches from Bond-Street, and the benches were so cram'd that I was thrown into a fever! So hey for the breakfast.-Youth's the season made for joy!
Flush. Love is then our duty! &c.
(Exeunt singing together.)
SCENE II.-A garden at Mr. Savage's on Lans
down Hillma marquee at the upper wing, in which is seen a table full of fruits, wine, meat, tea urns, coffee pots, &c. A distant view of Bath-moon rising.–Long flourish of clarinets.
Enter Lady SARAH SAVAGE and a Servant.
Lady Sarah. Call Mifs Clara—(Servant enters marquee.)- I have given this party in order to secure this young creature and her fortune, for my brutish brother has so lessen'd our gold, that only her copper can save us from sinkingif her guardians refuse, we are prepar’d for bolder scheines.
Well: my dear girl, how do you like our breakfast?—breakfast by moonlight? isn't it quite charming—fo nouvelle ?
Clara. Quite and in addition to tea and coffee, here are fowls, fruit, and wine; so that you may breakfast, dine, drink tea, and sup all in the same meal-nouvelle !—surely nobody else is fo fingular.
Lady Sarah. I don't know, I never copy—the world's so very ignorant—that only act unlike other people,and you're pretty sure of being right. But, didn't you like the music—the finging ?
Clara. No; I don't much like these fine fingers--it's a long time before you prevail on them to fing, and then when they once beginfaith! they never stop. I declare I only saw one person I liked amongst the party.
Lady Sarah. And who was that the dear Signor?
Clara. No—the dear creature, my guardian's son.
Lady Sarah. What! that monster? I wonder who invited such a heterogeneous animal, and you to prefer him
Clara. Even to your brother, ma'am-I know Mr. Savage designs me his hand; but, if my guardians will agree—and why they leave me in this scene of danger when I wrote to Sir PaulLady Sarah. Here they are both—I'll go
call my brother, and by the time I return, I hope I shall call you, fister-adieu !-Gingham, indeed!
Enter Sir PAUL and Flush.
Flush. Here she is—here's the girl to answer for herself now be cool, Sir Paul-compose yourself, and I'll fairly put the question to her. Clara, havn't
your affections ? Clara. To confess the truth, I have, fir. Flush. Very well—softly, Sir Paul! and now, what is the gentleman's name?
Sir Paul. Ay, what is his name, Clary?
Sir Paul. Why there! I told you fo—it's my son !
Fluß. Your són !—In the first place I don't believe you have a son ; and in the next, do you pretend that this Gingham
Sir Paul. Is my boy! my own darling child !--and I'll prove it.
Fluß. Well, well, if this is the case I'll make you a fair proposition, let's call in both our sons, and let the one she prefers be her husband.
Sir Paul. Agreed-and I'll bet you a hundred pounds she chooses mine.
Flus. Done-I'll bet you a hundred she chooses mine.
Gingham. (within the marquee.) My life! my love ! my Clara !
Flus. Here he comes ! (rubbing his hands.)
Gingham. (within the marquee.) I cannot live a moment from thee-1
GINGHAM enters from the Marquee, and, seeing
bis two fathers together, pauses and starts. Flusb. Now, Clara--Silence, Sir Paul!- don't you choose him !-him!—for
husband ? Clara. I do, fir. Flus. Huzza! I've won my bet!
Sir Paul. Here is a father don't know his own child.
Gingham. (Coming between them.) And here's a child don't know his own father! upon my soul, gentlemen, I cannot tell which of you had the honour of inventing me; but here I am, and if you have more property to distribute--if either of you has another two hundred-pounds, I'll dispose of it so neatly, that tears of joy shall trickle down your cheeks !
Flush. (After looking some time at Sir Paul.) Sir Paul !
Sir Paul. Mr. Flush-We were joint guardians just now, and — Fluß. And now we're joint fathers, it seems.
Sir Paul. This must be the tradesman-a word in private if you please, fir. (They enter the marquee.)
Gingham. Lay your heads together ; settle it as you please ; for while Clara (miles on me, I care not whether I'm fon to a haberdasher, or heir to the Grand Turk.
Clara. I hope they won't quarrel—I fear Mr Flush will infift
Gingham. He insist !-bless you, he'd sell me for half a crown !
Re-enter Flush and Sir Paul.
Sir Paul. He's mine! he's mine! the father knows his own child at last-I never suspected Flush was clerk to a Lottery Office, and confequently little thought he was the tradesman who married my Nelly-'gad ! I always took hiin for a gentleman. Gingham. Did you?--that was very good natur’d
-and so you give me up, Mr. Flush? Flush. Yes, I can afford it.- The Tunbridge story is perfectly explain'd, and I have done with you, you rogue-Your wise father here has promis'd to restore my papers, so now you may speak truth till you're black in the face.
Ging ham. May I ?-then I won't ; lest other faces should be of the same complexion—but, gentlemen, since you've found out who I belong to, will you inform me who this lady is to be long to?
Clara. Ay, Mr. Flush-I'm sure I shall have your consent---you are a monied man, and have lived with people of rank.