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Lady Henrietta, who is plac'd under your protection, you will refuse to countenance such infamous designs-They will draw you into the partnership, rob you of your fortune, and laugh at you for your folly.
Smalltrade. Indeed !
Warford. Yes, sir; and without your assistance they must fall to the ground; for though they make large fums every night—they contrive to spend 'em every day.
Smalltrade. Oh! then they do make large fums, do they ? Warford. Certainly-But how is it done? By perverting the laws of hospitality-by annihilating the bonds of society, and under the specious mask of rank and character, perpetrating crimes that common sharpers are excluded from.
Smalltrade. What's that to you or me? If the money's made, it's quite enough to satisfy my conscience! So, go, fir—finih the articles of partnership, and bring them instantly.
Warford. Oh, fir! consider–Even now perhaps Lady Henrietta is falling a victim to their artifices, and if you join the confederacy, all all will be undone !
Smalltrade. Go, fir-no reply-I must and will be obeyed.
[Exit WARFORD. Senseless fat! While I can fiil my stomach in one room, and my pockets in the other, what do l care for him or Henrietta? But now to take a peep, just to see who's losing. (Looks in Faro-Room.)
Pavè. Really, this is a most shocking business—I'm told they've drawn in their relation, a filly country banker-Sir Charles brought me down to be useful, but no prospect of advantage to myself, shall ever induce me to take part in a bad administration. -Ha! yonder's that little great man-Now, if I can but coax him into my list of promises ! Sir, your most obedient.
Smalltrade. Sir, your most devoted.
Parè. I see, fir, you're a friend of my patron, Sir Charles-And, next to being a man of rank one's self, I know nothing like living amongst them-Where does your interest lay, sir?
Smalltrade. My intereft! Who the deuce is this?
Pavè. I wish I knew his title. (afide.) Pray be seated, fir. (They fit.) Now, sir. (Taking out his roll of promises.) Look at that list of promises ! Many of your noble friends, you fee, fir-but nothing done ! Nothing !
Smalltrade. Many of my noble friends! Oh! what, you want promotion, do you ?-My dear sir, I've no influence.
Pavè. Excuse me, fir-I know better-Do you think I can't tell a great man when I see him? (SMALLTRADE looks pleas'd.) Besides, when was it that such manners, such an appearance, and such a style of dress cou'dn't command every thing. (SMALLTRADE looks more pleas’d.) My dear fir, you remind me of the old court, you do indeed - Of an old bedchamber lord,
Smalltrade. (greatly pleas'd) Bedchamber lord ! Ay; I'm very upright. (Holds up his head.)
Pavè. Perhaps you are diffident, sir-never applied.
Smalltrade. Why, that's very true I never did ask a man in power a favour, never-I've à great mind to try
Pavè. Do-make the experiment, and by way of sounding, get a small snug appointment for me, before you ask a grand one for yourself.
Smalltrade. I will—I'll get a little one for you, and a great one for myself
---Was there ever such a delicious scene? How riches do pour in upon me!
Pavè. Riches ! Why, did the scheme never strike you before?
Smalltrade. Never-And I'm amazed I cou'd be such a greenhorn. (rises.) Oh! I'll go and ask Sir Charles directly.
Pavè. Ask Sir Charles ! Pooh! he's only one hope himself.
Smalltrade. One hope ! What's that?
Pavè. Why, don't you know? As we're alone I'll tell you-There's a country bankerThey've drawn in the old greenhorn to be a
Pavè. He'll stop payment of course, and as he's not a man of character-only a little sneak, ing, shuming shopman._For my part I'm glad on't, an't you, sir?
Smallırade. Indeed I am not, fir. So, he's to be a bankrupt, is he? Pavè. Certainly-I shall, perhaps, be one of
his creditors—But between you and I, I sha'n't sign his certificate.
Smalltrade. You won't sign his certificate !
Pavè. No-what business has a tradesman to turn black legs? To be sure he won't sneak into the Gazette like a tailor or a tallow-chandler for a paltry hundred or so! No-he'll preserve his dignity! Fail like a gentleman for thirty or forty thousand pounds—You take the joke, don's you?
Smalltrade. No, dam’me if I do? And they mean to ruin him do they?
Pavè. Ruin him! Oh! it's all settled! Sir Charles told me he saw him lose a guinea just now-" Poor devil,” says he, “he liccle thinks s how near it is his last." Ha, ha, ha! (Welks up the stage.)
Re-enter Warford (with the Articles). Warford. According to your commands, sir, I have brought you the articles.
Smallırade. Have you? Then thus I tear them. (Taking and tearing them.) George, I ask your pardon—I'm so alham’d, yet so gratified, that though that impudent dog has infulted me, I can't help liking him for having open'd my eyes.
Pavè. (coming down fiage) Well!-have you thought-Oh, mum-applying to a friend ! That's right-stick close to every body.
Smalltrade. Did you ever hear such a fellow? But come, let's return home, and instead of this new-fangled mode of getting money, we'll grow rich the old way-By honesty and industry,
Warford. Stay, fir-think that Lady Henrietta is still in danger, and sure you will not leave the house till she is released.
Smallırade. What can I do, George? Neither you nor I can persuade her, and unless her father, Lord Orville, were here
Pavè. Lord Orville! That's the man! He can fettle us all-Oh! I wish I knew how to oblige him.
Warford. Do you, sir? Then, his daughter, Lady Henrietta, is now at the gaming-table, and if you
will but fave her as you have this gentleman, I'll answer for it, her father will reward you.
Pavè. Reward me! my dear fir, when a lady's in distress, do you think I care who or what her father is ? Lord Orville's daughter! Whugh! Here's an opportunity! Oh! I'll go find her out directly.
Warford. Be cautious, firfor if Sir Charles discovers
your intentionsPavè. What then, sir? Do you suppose I'm influenced by any but people of merit and dirtinction? Such as Lord Orville, and your elegant friend, my graceful bedchamber lord, who, I know, will not forget the snug appointmentWhere shall I conduct the lady?
Smalltrade. We'll wait below -- And, d'ye hear-Tell Miss Dazzle not to forget to fleece the country banker.
Pare. I will — And shew Sir Charles I'm a man of real consequence. Adieu ! wait here a moment, and you'll see the little tradesman come out howling! But it won't do I sha'n't fign his certificate ! Ha, ha, ha!