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that glees were sung from the Woolfack, and catches from the Cabinet.
Lord far. Who have we amongst us, Colonel?
Col. I'll tell you First, there's Duke Duett playing on the violin---then there's Gene. ral Grig blowing the trumpet, Judge Jerk blowing the bassoon, and Bishop Bravo banging the kettle-drums !-But what's better, there's Sige nor Uniquo, who pats them all familiarly on the back, and says, “ bravissimo, my Lord Judge ! Encora, Signor Bishop !" Then, the one looks as pleased as if he'd got the Chancellorship, and the other, as if he was preferred to an Archbishoprick !-Pray is your lordship fond of music?
Lord Jar. Me! I hate, I detest ic !
Lady d. Hate music, my Lord ! Dear! I always thought it was one of your favourite amuse. ments.
Lord far. What, music! Oh, certainly - I love it of all things.
Col. Well; for my part I shall not listen to their lordships till Uniquo gets them engaged at the opera - As to you, Lady Acid, I know your sense and virtue despises this trifting folly, and you only promote it to amuse your friends.
Lady A. I do indeed, Colonel (ftrumming of instrumemts within.) I must go and look at them Come, my Lord.
Lord Jar. (taking ber hand.) With pleasure! Colonel, is iny friend Nominal amongst them?
Col. My ward! Zounds ! don't talk of him -but go, and if you wish for fiddling preferment, pay your respects to the Grand Signor.
[Exeunt Lord and Lady. MyWard, indeed! Oh that stupid studious puppy! I know what it will end in-He'll go sneaking on in his profession, till he gets into the Upper
House, then he'll be laid on the shelf, and go odt like the snuff of a candle - As to that ruffian, and the assault, I'll be reveng'd on Clairville still --For Sophia, the dear creature seems fonder of me than ever, since last night's riot—The women do love a little rudeness now and then.
Enter James. James. Sir, Miss Sophia's maid is below, and desires to see you.
Col. There ! I said fo-Oh, I and my Epaulette play the devil with the women !
James. She has a letter for
« Col. A letter ! Ah ! I muft-poor Sir Andrew ! he wou'dn't believe I was her darling hope.”
James. That she will deliver to nobody but yourself, Sir.
Col. Well; if it must be foIt's very strange what can make the fex adore me so passionately! It must be my manners, my tender, graceful, insinuating manners! Shew me to her, James; and while their Lordships are fiddling for the good of the nation, I'll amuse nyfelf for the benefit of Sophia, poor Sophia! -Oh, Colonel ! Colonel ! wbat fools do you make of the women !
[Exit, followed by James.
SCENE-SIR ANDREW Acid's Garden.
Saun. Where can my cousin Sophia be loitering! This is the place of affignation, and I fee neither her nor the Colonel, nor Sir Andrew-I
hope there's no mistake, for on their exposition depends her future happiness.
Enter Sophia, hastily. Sophia. Oh cousin! my dear cousin, I'm undone ! ---As much ruin'd as if I'd never been an authoress, or an actress, or a painter, or a
Saun. Why, what has happen'd ?
Sophia. Lady Acid, unknown to Sir Andrew, has read the aflignation you made me send him. ---She is now convinced the love is on my part, and is pursuing me here to be revenged.--- Dear me, I wish I had not written to him.
Saun. Not written to him! Unless you'd put a stop to his and the Colonel's vanity, you know you'd have been sent in the country---nay, loft your character, and never shewn your face in fashionable life again.
Sophia. Never shewn my face ! Lord ! it rather helps one, and, in fashionable life, loss of character makes one's reputation; but what is to become of me! If I'm fent to the country, I shall die, I I know I shall, and so suddenly, I than't have time to write my own life, and run down half my acquaintance.
LADY ACID (without.) Lady A. Where is the Jezabel ! I'll make an example of her.
Sophie. Here she comes, and I shall be lock'd up in an uld country castle, where there's a conftant knocking at the gates to see the apartments; but not a person to enquire after poor I, the prisoner. G 2
Enter LADY Acid. Lady A. So Miss, notwithstanding the warning 1
gave you, you have been writing an assignation to my husband - and this is the place-look at me--answer me do you deny it ?
Sophia. No, Madam; I own that I wrote such affignations to both the Colonel and Sir Andrew.
Lady A. The Colonel too! mercy on me! wou'dn't one content you?
Sophia. Yes, Madam ; but I did it to bring them together, and laugh at them; for indeed they have soʻteiz'd me.
Lady A. They reiz'd you ? here's effrontery ! Jook ye, I know they hate and despise you, and they have both told me a thousand times that your love was troublefome and disgusting.
Saun. Your Ladyship, I can contradiet that ---for I have now in my pocket both their answers to Sophia's assignation --each accepts her invitation, and will be here at the time appointed ---besides, you must be sensible that her loving them is a joke.
Lady A. Joke! don't talk to me of jukes, Sir.ca I never made one in my life ; and I know the loves them as much as they deteft her and it's all owing to her romantic turn of mind, her acting, her writing
Sophia. Nay, my Lady, don't abuse my talents -Didn't my last production go through four editions ?
Lady A. Yes; and why did it ? because it was patronized. And now-a-days, it is not the book itself, but the name of the person who writes it.
While the woman of fashion shall write a bad work, and have a thousand subscribers, a poor neglected man of genius. shall write a good one, and not have a single patron ! if indeed, you had follow'd my advice written sentimentally and morally
Sophia. I did, Madam-I did write morally, and what was the confequence? I had made a sum of money by a Novel calld“ Seduction” ---and loft it all by writing an “Effay on Chasity;" but indeed, Sir Andrew and the Colonel are to blame, and if you'll wait a moment, you'll sec them come to the asignation.
Lady A. They come ! they know better-besides despising you, they value my good opinion too highly to trifle with it in this manner-fo, retire to the country.
[Laying bold of ber. Saun. Pray hear reason, Madam. Lady 4. I'll hear nothing, she shall be punished! the shall ! (Jees Sir ANDREW without) Bless me ! what do I fee! my husband capering and smiling!
Sophia, Ay; there's one of them-and tee, Madam -- yonder's the other.
Lady A. The Colonel, as I live! This is amazing! stand back and let's observe them,
Enter SoR ANDREW, with a letter in his hand.
Col. “ I idolize you as much as I despise Sir Andrew."
Sir Andrew, “ I adore you as much as I abhor the Colonel."