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INTRODUCTION OF Gas LIGHT INTO DUMFRIES,_“Na, the SHARP ENOUGH ALREADY. A soliciter, who was remarklike o' that !” said Jenny Bryden."I wonder what the able for the length and sharpness of his nose, once told a lady, world 'll come to at last. Gas light they ca't, but elf light that if she did not immediately settle a matter in dispute, he wad be a better name. My certy ! but there's an unco differ would file a bill against her. « Indeed, sir," said the lady, ence atween a low that needs neither oil, tallow, nor wick, an'a " there is no necessity for you to file your bill, for I am sure it bawbee cannel, an auld cruizie, or a bit fir stick ta'en oot o' the is sharp enough already."

My mither, honest woman! was weel eneuch pleased National Para DOXES.Somebody once remarked, that the wi' sic a taper; and am doubtin' whether she wad hae been Englishman is never happy but when he is miserable ; the unco fond o' reading her Bible at a witch-light. Puir spunkie! Scotchman is never at home but when he is abroad; and the am maist wae for him. His bit dancin' light was cheerie as Irishman is never at peace but when he is fighting well as eerie whan twa war thegither, an'no that får frae hame; but he may douce his glim an' gang his wa's hame whene er he

NAPOLEON AND THE Twelve Apostles. The Cabinet de likes, if it be true that the man at the gas-wark can mak ten Lecture gives the following anecdote of Napoleon, without thousand spunkies at ae brewin'. A' things hae changed noo." pledging itself for its authenticity-if not so, it is at all events -“Ay,” said Betty Cameron, "if it's no enchantment, it's very characteristic:-“ Napoleon having entered one of the unco like it. In place o' being fashed with weeks and creesh, cities of Italy, the churchwardens recommended to bim the ye just turn about a bit spigot thing, an' oot spoots a light like reliques of their church. 'Sire, will you deign to take our sour milk out o' a barrel. Changed times indeed ! Atween wood ? No, sire. Of what are they, then? Of silver Liverpool an' Manchester the coaches rin their lane ; an' noo we hae a bonny clear light, ta'en like water in pipes under the sire of solid silver.'. • Solid silver !' replied Napoleon quickly, grund, thar!l spoot up at ony part ye like, if ye only bore a hole Yes, I shall help them to fulfil their mission; it has bæa no muckle bigger than a preen-head. Weel, weel, 'I wish them ordained that they should go throughout the world, and the muckle luck o't; but it'll be a while afore the gudeman catches shall.' Having

said so, the Emperor sent the twelve Apostles me darnin' his stockings wi' a witch taper at the chumley lug. to the Mint at Paris.” The brownies langsyne war very belpfu' ; but we've nae use To DETERMINE THE ECONOMY OF A Cow.-The anonal for brownie, noo. T'he Yediter, as they ca’ him, says the only consumption of food per cow, if turned to grass, is from one salamander kent noo's the spark bred in the blacksmith's acre to an acre and a half in summer, and from a ton to throat, and the only brownie a steam-engine, sic as they hae in ton and a half of hay in the winter.

A cow may be allowed the Infirmary at Liverpool, that pumps water, kirns the kirn, two pecks of carrots per day. The grass being cut and carried

, Frashes claes, minches turnips, champs potatoes, and wad even will economize it full one-third. The annual product of a good i mak’ the bed wi' its iron arms if they wad let it. Everything's fair dairy cow, during several months after calving, and either dune wi' machinery that can be dune, an' a great deal mair than summer or winter, if duly fed and kept in the latter season, will should be done that's what I say."-M Diarmid's Picture of be an average of seven pounds of butter per week, from fire to Dumfries.

three gallons per day. Afterwards a weekly average of three The Scottish Thistle.-This ancient emblem of Scottish It depends upon the constitution of the cow, how nearly sba

or four pounds of butter from barely half the quantity of milk. pugnacity, with its motto Nemo me impunc lacessit, is repre may be milked to the time of her calving, some giving good sented of various species in roval bearings, coing, and coats of milk until within a week or two of that period, others requiring armour, so that there is some difficulty in saying which is the to be dried eight or nine weeks previously. genuine original thistle. The origin of the national badge itself is thus handed down by tradition :- When the Danes invaded Scotland, it was deemed unwarlike to attack an enemy Besides appearing in Weekly NUMBERS, the SCHOOLMASTER in the pitch darkness of night, instead of a pitched battle by is published in MONTHLY Parts, which stitched in a neat cover, day ; but on one occasion the invaders resolved to avail thein contains as much letter-press, of good execution, as any of the large selves of this stratagem; and in order to prevent their tramp Monthly Periodicals: A Table of Contents will be given at the end of from being heard, they marched barefooted. They had thus the year ; when, at the weekly cost of three-halfpence, a handsome neared the Scottish force unobserved, when a Dane unluckily volume of 832 pages, super-royal size, may be bound up, containing stepped with his naked foot upon a superbly prickled thistle, much matter worthy of preservation. and instinctively uttered a cry of pain, which discovered the assault to the Scots, who ran to their arms, and defeated the STONE'S MONTHLY REGISTER, may be had of all the Bock

Part II., containing the five September Numbers, with JOHN. foe with a terrible slaughter. The thistle was immediately sellers.

Price 9d. For the accommodation of weekly readers, the adopted as the insignia of Scotland.-Literary Gasette.

Monthly Register and Cover may be had separately at the different LORDS ELDON AND STOWELL.-John Scott, Lord Eldon, places of sale. Price One Penny. was born at Newcastle upon Tyne, and is the third son of William Scott, of that town. His father was by trade what in the language of the place is called a " fitter," or agent for the sale and shipment of coals. He had, by industry and habits of OCTOBER.-Notes of the Month ; Harvest-home; the Kirn; close saving, accumulated rather considerable means from small the Maiden ; the Woods of October ; Rationale of the Colourbeginnings. Beyond this he was a man of great shrewdness ing of the Woods....... and knowledge of the world, and quickly perceiving the strong, Books of the MONTH.—The Magazines ; New Novels ; Life of and what was better, marketable talents of his younger boys, Andrew Marvell, &c. ............. William and John, he wisely gave them an education in accor MEMOIR OF AN EDINBURGH TRADESMAN...................... 149 dance with their mental endowments. It is said that the singular variety in the talent of these two remarkable youths was

The Corn Laws, alias The Bread Tax.... ......... manifested at a very early age. When asked to "give an ac

Progress of Scotch Agriculture....................... count of the sermon," which was a coostant Sabbath custom of

The Sea Serpent-solved......................... their father, William, the eldest (now Lord Stowell), gave at once a condensed and lucid digest of the general argument and ELEMENTS OF THOUGHT-Rich and Poor ; The Inferior points of the discourse, if it had the good fortune to possess any Gentry, &c. ..... smack of qualities so rarely to be found in sermons. John, on Whale Fishery of New South Wales.... the other hand, would go into all the minutiæ of the barangue,

European Population...... whether long or short; but failed in producing the lucid gene

COLUMN FOR THE LADIES-Kissing off Sailors-Wedding Preral view embodied in half the number of words by his brother.

sents, &c. ...... And thus were their characters through life ; so true to nature

Mr. Babbage's Calculating Machine..... is the admirable aphorism of Wordsworth “ The boy's the father of the man." William was from the beginning destin

The Temple of Nature by David Vedder..... ed for the study of the law. John, however, was at first in

Autobiography of an Unhappy Object tended for the church, a destination which his early marriage

SCRAPS-Original and Selected........ was the unfortunate means of changing ; and he, together with his brother, set out to fight his way in the world as a young EDINBURGH: Printed by and for JOHN JOHNSTONE, 19, Sh. James's lawyer. The issue of the encounter was not long doubtful; for Square. ---Published by John ANDERSON, Jun., Bookseller, 55, North not only were his education and character, but every previous Bridge Street, Edinburgh; by Joun MacLeod, and ATKINSON * incident of his life, admirably calculated to fit him for the scenes Co., Booksellers, Glasgow; and sold by all Booksellers and Vendett in which he was destined to act a part.— Tait's Magazine. of Cheap Periodicals.



...............147 to 10

.150 . 150

.152 ....133



...156 ..156

..........157 ...........158





No. 11.-Vol. I. SATURDAY, OCTOBER 13, 1832.


IMPORTANCE OF THE STUDY OF shapen body of the mechanic, confined to certain

actions and attitudes, is to the Godlike form of

the most perfect specimen of human nature.” We ALTHOUGH, in our preliminary address, we stated entreat our readers, therefore, that, while they take that one of our chief objects in conducting the every proper means to increase their political inSCHOOLMASTER, would be to give as much political formation, they neglect no opportunity of acquirinformation as the state of the laws affecting the ing a knowledge of general science. The interest, press would allow, yet we were fully aware of the indeed, which belongs to political discussions, is great importance of diffusing a knowledge of the often temporary and dependent on circumstances, Sciences, in general, among the people, and, of and may therefore be exhausted, -as, for example, course, had no intention of excluding them from who would now take any interest in discussing the our pages. We consider it, however, to be one reasonableness of the system of Parliamentary reof man's first duties to make himself acquainted presentation happily “ now no more?” But the with the political affairs of the world at large, and gratification and improvement to be derived from particularly with those of his own country, and, as inquiring into the ways of nature, are like a mine

ar necessary accompaniment with the general doc. which is not only inexhaustible, but which grows 1. trines of Political Economy. Our reason for wishing richer and richer the farther we proceed in our

information of this kind extensively diffused, is, excavations. For example, we may take great dethat the people, having a correct knowledge of light in observing the annual growth and decay of their situation, may exercise an intelligent and the flowers of the fields, even though almost enmoral influence over their rulers; and that thus tirely ignorant of their economy. But let us pro

the affairs of the nation may be conducted on just, ceed to inquire into their nature and habits, the s rational, and equitable principles; because expe- structure of their organs, and the means by which

rience tells us that, unless this wholesome influence they appropriate the juices of the earth and con. is exercised, government will be carried on in an vert them into their own substance ; and who will unjust, irrational, and oppressive manner.

doubt that the gratification derived from such He, however, who limits his studies to politics, plants will be infinitely increased ? In like manand especially to the mere politics of the day, ner, no one can behold the powerful movements of stops very far short of that degree of intelligence a steam-engine without gratification, though ignowhich a person living in the nineteenth century rant of its principles and structure. But when he ought to possess. A mere violent, babbling poli- learns that the power which causes all the wondertician, ignorant of every thing else, is a being ful movements before him is nothing but common infinitely inferior to one who, with a competent steam-when he comes to understand the simpli. knowledge of political science, lends his influence, city of what at first appeared complex—with w founded on such knowledge, to ameliorate the an increased feeling of delight will be then gaze on condition of society, and has, at the same time, a ge- the object before him And this will be found to neral knowledge of the scien es in general; or, in be the same to whatever province of nature's works other words, of the works of the Almighty :-such we direct our attention ;-our gratification and ima being is indeed worthy of the name and Godlike provement will just be in proportion to our knowform of man. In the words of Dr. Arnott, “ He ledge. whose view is bounded by the limits of one or two When we speak of acquiring a knowledge of the small departments, will probably have very false ideas various sciences, we mean, in other words, a geneeren of them, but he certainly will, of other parts, and ral knowledge of the laws of the Almighty. He of the whole, so as to be constantly exposed to who possesses a complete knowledge of the vacommit errors hurtful to himself or to others. His rious sciences which relate to matter, has a commind, compared to the well-ordered mind of a pro- plete knowledge of the laws to which matter has perly educated man, is what the crooked and mis- | been subjected by the Creator. Water, for instance,

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has certain properties inherent in it; and it pos- | is the knowledge of science, of the laws to which sesses these properties by a law, or laws, of the the numerous substances in nature have been subAlmighty. One of its properties is, that it runs jected by the Almighty, and the power of applyfrom a higher to a lower level; hence we have ing our knowledge to the improvement of our conrivers. Another property is, that when heated to dition, which has placed this country in its pre. a certain degree, it passes into that wonderful sent proud situation among the nations of the aeriform matter called steam. In like manner, the earth.“ A man,” says Lord Brougham, “having two metals, copper and zinc, have distinctive quali. only a pot to boil, is sure to learn from science ties; but when combined together in certain pro- reasons which will enable him to 'cook his morse] portions, their distinctive qualities cease, and they better, save his fuel, and both vary his dish and form that useful and beautiful metal, brass. And improve it.” We have read of some savages, this, too, proceeds from laws of the Almighty. who, when they were first discovered, did not know The study of science, therefore, is the study of the even how to “ boil their pot,” and when they saw laws of God; and the investigation of these laws their visitors proceed to kindle a fire, and to “ boil is a duty which we owe, not only to ourselves, but their pot,” the poor savages ran off in terror. to their divine author.

These men were therefore almost in total ignor. In the Scriptures we have much important in-ance of nature's laws, and they lived in a state of formation conveyed to us, rules of morality laid the extremest poverty and wretchedness. But undown, and the will of God revealed, in regard to der the head of profit, we may include the benefits matters of which, if left to our unaided faculties, which accrue to us in the shape of health, from we must have for ever remained ignorant. Now, knowing and obeying God's laws. The enjoyment surely no one will deny the benefit to be derived of health depends to a very great extent on the atfrom studying the will of God, as made known to tention we pay certain laws of our Maker. Many us in the Scriptures; and we conceive that the be- of these yet remain to be discovered—as, for exnefit to be in like manner derivable from studying ample, the laws which, when obeyed, will make that His will, or laws, as made known to us by science, disease--frightful in the present state of our knowis only secondary in importance to the other. In ledge--Cholera, turn harmless from our doors

. both cases, we acquire a knowledge of the Divine But many of the laws of health are habitually newill—in the former case conveyed to us in direct glected, as in the daily recurring scenes of dissipa. terms, because our faculties are too weak to have tion, neglecting proper exercise, ventilation, &c., otherwise made the acquirement–in the latter not because they positively are not known, but becase we are left to discover them of ourselves, because we have not a sufficiently extensive acquain. cause they are within the reach of our faculties. tance with the laws of nature in general, and have Some people who fancy themselves very pious and not attained that all-relying confidence in their indevout, either do, or fain would, interdict from variableness, which a more extensive knowledge their shelves all books except such as are strictly of them can alone create. termed religious; little fancying, in the depths of This ignorance this contracted view of the their ignorance, that they are thus shewing a con- works of nature, is the cause of the many absurd tempt for, and a dislike to, the works of their notions so prevalent in society. It is this which Creator—those of his works, namely, which are causes us rashly and presumptuously to conceive revealed to us by science. We think that the habit that we can improve on the works of nature of studying science, with a reference to the Divine which causes ladies to imagine that they can imAuthor of the objects we are investigating, is too prove their beauty by contracting their waists onemuch neglected ; and that we ought never to for- half, and which causes gentlemen to conceive they get that, while engaged in the pursuit of science, can improve the appearance of their horses by cut, we are investigating the works of God. We con- ting away their tails! The circumference of ladies' ceive, therefore, that it is eminently the duty of waists, and the length of horses' tails, were not, howthe clergy to convey to the people a knowledge of ever, given without a purpose ; and he or she who the Divine laws, revealed to us by science, as well presumes, with cord or scissors, to improve the one as of those which are revealed to us in the Scrip- or the other, must infallibly work mischief

. It was tures; and as eminently the duty of the people to at one time the custom to cut trees into various spare no labour in acquiring such knowledge ; fantastic shapes by way of improving their appearthe latter, indeed, is the peculiar province of the ance, but this notion has passed away as a know Sabbath-the former of the week days.

ledge of nature increased ; and we hope to see the But the benefits derivable from possessing a day when ladies' waists and horses' tails will in like knowledge of science do not stop here ; but, what manner be allowed to grow to their natural dimenmay perhaps have more influence on many than sions. These deviations from Nature do not, how. any other consideratious, profit, also follows in ever, as those acquainted with the invariable their train. The most unthinking must be aware workings of the Almighty's laws would have antiof the benefits which even our present limited cipated, escape the consequences

. Medical men tell knowledge of science has conferred on us in our us that diseases in the spine are rapidly increasing manufactures, agriculture, &c. The steam.engine among females, and this in consequence of tight is indeed of itself a host. Let it suffice, that it lacing! And we have somewhere seen it stated,

that at the commencement of a summer campaign, The poetry, notwithstanding this modest disclamature, is the horses in the British cavalry'used always to be of no ordinary merit, but truth is the soul of the perform

The poem in better condition than those of other countries, ance, presented in vivid and stirring forms

opens with this pleasing description of The Village :but that ere the campaign was half done, they were

Our village has a pleasant look, in the worst condition, and this from want of their

A happy look as e'er was seen tails to drive away the flies !

Right through the valley flows a brook, We have thus attempted to show that we ought

Which winds in many a flow'ry nook,

And freshens all the green. vigorously to investigate science, 1st, Because we

On either side, so clean and white, will derive much gratification and improvement

A row of cottages you see

And jessamine is clustered o'er from the study ; 2dly, Because the study of science

The humble trellis of each door, is the study of the works of God, and that there

Then left to clamber free,

And shake its blossoms far and wide fore we are bound in duty and gratitude to make

O'er all the white-wash'd cottage side. it the subject of our anxious investigation; and,

As dying evening sinks away,

The old church tower, erect and grey, 3dly, Because, a knowledge of science will enable

Catches far up the parting light, us to better our condition. We have only then to

And half grows holy to the sight. add, that we shall occasionally devote a column of The picture of the church is wound up to point the costthe Schoolmaster to investigations in science; and trast between the “pensive sinner” and the comfortable

Rector. It is we need hardly add, our explanations shall at all times be of the most popular description, and level

Calm, silent, shaded, and serene,

Some blessed spot where God has been. to the minds of the least-educated reader.

Here might the pensive sinner creep

To mourn his wicked courses :

Here, o'er his “ youth's fond errors" veepCONDITION OF THE POOR OF ENGLAND.

What matter though the Rector keep

His carriage and four horses ? “THE VILLAGE POOR-HOUSE." BY A COUNTRY

Weep on! thou man of sin and tears!-

But trouble not the Rector's ears.

The Rectory stands all aloof,

And rears its proudly slated roof We conceive onrselves happy in an opportunity of in

In middle of a stately park, troducing to Scotch readers a poem which the Schoolmaster

(Five acres and a perch.) thinks the most striking publication of the season, both in

The porter's lodge, where lives the clerk,

Gives entrance by an iron gate subject and execution. It had, we understand, been out of

Wide-opened upon days of state, print, before it was even heard of at this end of the island,

When my lady drives from Church ;

For my lady's knees are so stiff with kneeling, where, however, it was noticed cursorily, but with high

And her nerves so strain'd with devotional feeling, praise, in Tait's Magazine for August. It will make its

That she sends for the carriage and takes a drive,

And comes home to dinner at half-past five. own speedy way to extensive popularity. The writer, in a neatly turned dedication to Lord BROUGHAM, describes his

We have next the spruce dwelling of the thriving Attor. poem as “ an attempt to illustrate the state of feeling amidst ney, which, besides its plaster front, verandah, and pilas.

ters, has a gravelled drive, and a high-railed wall; fyr, the the pauper population.” A portentous state of feeling that worthy innate must peeda be, if, as we dare not doubt, his descriptions are

could not endure that his windows should lie accurate and faithful. In an introductory epistle to a

Exposed to every vulgar eye friend, he says :

The principal gate is always barrid,

But a door leads through the stable-yard, *Five years' experience as a country curate, has taught me many

And see!-- just over the wall, you can get painful lessons and many bitter truths. It has shown me a degraded

A view of the roof of his barouchette, and benighted peasantry, and convinced me that all the descriptions of

Blazon'd and gilt for his lady's rides; country life, which we admire in the poets, are only poetical. •God

And he keeps a green gig for himself besides. made the country, and man made the town.' Alas! God made both,

A thriving village-fair to see ad map defaces both. But when we turn fom the representations of

Admired by each new comer, rural life to its reality, we are startled to find the virtues as much banish

And leaves are out on every tree, ed from the groves as from the crowded alley; and, I grieve to say it,

The birds sing loud, the birds fly free, I stronger line drawn between the extremes of society-or, at least, a

'Tis now the height of summer. sler gap between its connecting links, than even in great cities. Was

Oh, blessed God! who o'er the earth, the rural population once happy and contented, as we find them de.

The air, the sea, hast scatter'd mirth, scribed in books ? dr was it the surface only that presented this appear.

The blessed mirth that cheers the heart, mce, wule misery and discontent lurked unseen below ? Men are be.

When happiness and joy must rise cozing progressively enlightened, and acquire a power of feeling their

From every sight that charms the eyes meries, and of expressing them. My neighbours here- charitable,

How good, how bountiful thoa art! kodhented and benevolent on all other subjects have an apathy about

Oh, what has man to think of more to sifferings of the poor which surprises me. They tell me that, thirty

Than bless thy goodness and adore ? yao, wlien all the articles of consumption were dearer, their

The gloomy Village Poor-house comes next, with its Tus pere Jess;- and still tirat there were no complaints while the

miserable inmates, Tmes were in power. I am not old enough to know whether this be true or not, froin my own observation ; but if it be true that their

Men-young, and sinewy, and strong, Eers was greater and their complaints unuttered, I can only hail it

Condemn'd to see, day after day, al' specimen melioris ævi,' that the poor are beginning to have their

Their moments creep along biri advocated, and their sufferings attended to."

ly sloth-for they have nought to do,

And start ye not-in hunger too! The author then contends for educating the poor, and modestly concludes :

From the picture of these gnawing miscries, and the * With regard to the following verses, if they attract any attention

black despair of the men and women of the work-house, we to the actual present state of feeling amongst the poor, I shall be quite have this rapid transition :eztisfied. As to the poetry of the performance, the less said the better ;

There's a wit at the Parson's board to-day, try is too high a word to be applied to any composition of mine."

How fast he speaks, and the party how gay

The gentlemen roar-at a College joke,
Smith and Elder, London. Pp. 61.

The ladies blush-at an equivoque

And ever as livelier leaps the champaigne,

In this way the poem proceeds. Part II. opens with the Still merrier grows the jester's strain.

description of a well-fed, pompous, and slyly sensual cleri. Hal ha! how his puns would fall fat and dead

cal magistrate riding to Quarter Sessions, to officiate as If bis auditor's souls were faint for bread;

Chairman, when his horse is startled in passing the village
How shudderingly from his quips they'd start
If hunger and thirst were gnawing the heart!

work-house door and
Music!-a lady's jewell'a'finger

It seems 60 strange to a Magistrate's steed
Fondly seeins to love to linger

That a pauper should sing, that he's startled indeed;
O'er the harp's enamourd string

And the clerical Justice has some thoughts of bringing
Ere she opes her lips to sing

An action against the low wretches for singing;
Roses-posies—bliss, and kiss,

Impertinent dogs!
Every hand is raised in praise

The song is that of Martha Green, an aged female pauper,
Of the sentimental lays,
And tears,-ay, tears, -are scen to pour

who sings her yesternight's dreams of her cottage home, O'er the mock miseries of Moore !

and early maternal happiness. This song is replete with

pathos and beauty. Back again to a wretched room of the work-house,

It was a blessed dream, where we listen to the song of Will Somers, à pauper, Methought I saw a fair young child, a cottage, and a stream, whom misery is, even now, hurrying into crime; and who, A fair young child beside the stream, a cottage clean and white ; taxed beyond human endurance, is resolute to revenge the Methought my heart leapt up, to see so beautiful a sight. evils of his condition in the Squire's covers. Some stanzas And soon from forth the cottage came, with many a merry noise, of beautiful description lead us to the modern Farmer, A playful group of children fair, of happy girls and boys, whose work

Four fair-hair'd boys, four blue-eyed maids,-my heart leapt up to see

A careful mother watching them beneath a spreading tree,
- is over and done,

I look'd and look'd, and as I gazed on each fair boy and girl,
And merrily now, as sinks the sun,
He quaffs the brown ale till his heart grows kind,

My bosom heaved with many thoughts, my mind was in a whirl.
And he sups as if he had never dined;

Oh, God! the truth flash'd forth at once, the dream was a sign,And a village pauper comes creeping up,

I was that mother 'neath the tree, those little ones were mine!
Who envies bis mutton and cnvies his cup,

Eight girls and boys were there, I ween.-where are the darlings now?
And the Farmer hears his complaint with a frown,
And looses the mastiff to tear him down.

We can follow the fate of only one of this offspring of
This farmer is a yeoman bold

virtuous and suffering poverty-the widow's last son :of the right modern English mould;

My stately James, my pensive boy, so thoughtful and sedate,
To Rector and Squire, with countenance sad,

What fault is theirs who stung thy soul, and spurn'd thee into hate!
He says tithes are heavy and times are bad.

All, all at once, his nature changed a man of savage mood,
The Rector and Squire at his tale relent,

A ravening savage-demon-sold-despairingly he stood.
And take off from the tithes and diminish the rent.
Ho! ho! shouts the farmer, and jingles his purse,

What was his crime they never told, yet afterwards I heard,
The tithes might be higher, the times might be worse,

He spread a net, and caught in it some curious kind of bird-
But the Rector and Squire are a couple of sages

Some silly bird. They took my James and bound him as he slept,
I'll take sixpence a-week from my workmen's wages,

No word he spoke, but scowl'd severe, and scorn'd me as I wept. For the indolent rogues are much overfed

I saw my James, my gallant James ;-one night when, all alone, And I'll buy little Jane a piano instead.

I shiver'd at the fireless hearth, and made to God my moan, Again we return to the work-house to have another “Mother, I come to see you once, once more, before I die!

A man rush'd in, all spent with baste, with wild and blood-shot eye, pauper history and song ; impassioned, powerful, and pain. ful-a pauper domestic tragedy. The deep misery of Jack Not the same silent, soulless James you knew me in my youth.

“ Nay, doubt me not, I'm yours indeed, your James in very truth," Morley, brutalized by the extreme of want, and the degra- A man-though they have trampled me, and stamp'd with felon brand; dation of his un-wedded bride, whom we see but in her A man--for l've had vengeance now! there's murder on my hand ?" grave, are contrasted with the joyous nuptials of that happy Také, in opposition to the tragedy of poor Martha Green, pair of industrious persons, the butler and the lady's maid. this grave congregation of “ Learned Fellows." The village bells are, on a balmy morning, playing the

Six massive men in sable suit, triple bob-major in honour of a ceremony not opposed by

Of mighty bulk, and hanging brows, “ the prudential restraint.”

Are darkly sitting, foot to foot,
Well, I declare ! 'tis a beautiful sight-

Enjoying a carouse,

All learned men, and filled with knowledge,
Six pretty maidens dress'd trimly in white,

Six Senior Fellows of a College.
And see, all stiffend with velvet and silk,

How grave they sit! how wise they look !
The Bride, in a bonnet as spotless as milk.

Each portly face is as a book,
Louder and louder, the bells ring out,
And a crowd has collected all round about,

Where ye may read triangle and line,

Cube root, parallelogram, circle, and sign,
And off in four gigs sweeps the cavalcade,
The Butler has wedded the Lady's-Maid.

And a very particular judgment in wine !

Wise Senior Fellows are they all,
The Butler has two score and ten pounds a-year,

Steady as clock-work in chapel and hall;
The key of the cellar and cock of the beer,

Six mighty parsons devoted to heaven,
A hard-working man you may solemnly swear,

All looking out for a college living.
For he stands every day at his master's chair,

Twenty years have they wasted their breath,
And, after such labour, how hard is his fate,

In praying for murder and sudden death,
He must lock up the bottles and count the plate;

But the jolly incumbents, whose death would delight thein,
Ah! trulh to say, he's the worst used of men.

Live on, as if merely on purpose to spite them :-
His pounds should be double of two score and ten.

Twenty years they have all been engaged,
The Lady's-maid! she's to be pitied too,

And their mistresses now have grown certainly aged."
She has twenty pounds, and so much to do,

Oh! how they wade through the Morning Post,
To curl up her mistress's hair night and morning-

In hopes the old Rector has yielded the ghost,
It leaves so little time for her own adorning ;-

That he's broken his neck by a fall from his horse,
And just when dear Jenkins is saying sweet things,

Or gone off in a fit in the second course,
To be off' in the midst, if her lady's bell rings

Providentially choked by the bone of a cod,
In short, she's surrounded with toils and woes,

Or some morning found « Dead, -by the finger of God;"-
And wears all ner mist 056o cast-cffclothes,

Ah! Senior Fellowships always give birth

To" Glory to God and good will upon earth."
Besides tinging her cheek with rouges and plaster,

Though thuz lavish in quotation, we can give our read
And listening nonsensical tales from her master ;-
With labour and cares her position abounds,

ers no adequate idea of the force, point, and beauty of this And all for a trifle of twenty pounds!

poem-full of rapid and brilliant transitions its shifting Humour asserts, but then Retrour's a liar,

lights brought broadly out by the dark depths of its masThat the Butler's first-born will resornb.e the Squire. sive shadows. As a relief to the scenes we have passed, we

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