Some Remarks upon MARRIAGE.

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By Mr. T HO. BROWN.

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Arriage being the Port or Haven at which most of the Sons and Daughters of Eve defign to touch fooner or later, 'tis no Wonder that People are univerfally curious to know how this ticklish Ceremony is perform'd in other Countries. We find here at Home, that the first Place in the Common-PrayerBook, that young Maidens generally dip in, is the Service of Matrimony. I once knew a raw Girl, that` could readily make all the Refponfes in that Office, lefore he could anfwer to one Queftion in her Catechifm; which occafion'd her Father, who was a grave old Gentleman, to wish, that thofe of her Sex would take as much Care to prepare themselves for their latter, as for their firft End; for fo it proves to most

of them.

It has been frequently faid, that Marriage and Hanging go by Deftiny; but, for my Part, I am no Predeftinarian; neither do I believe, with the reft of the World, that Matches are made in Heaven any more than I believe that all Oxen are bought and fold there before they come to Smithfield-Market.

But tho' I am no Admirer of Destiny, as I faid before, yet I would not have any one infer from thence, that I believe there's no Manner of Refemblance between Hanging and Marrying For Hanging, with Reverence be it fpoken, as well as Marrying, is perform'd by tying a Knot, which Death only diffolves; and they agree too in this Particular, (which is more fuitable to the Occafion of the Book) that all civiliz'd Countries in the World obferve different Fafhions in one no lefs than the other.

The Roman Catholicks make a Sacrament of Matrimony, and, in Confequence of that Notion, pretend it confers Grace. The Proteftant Divines don't carry Matters fo high; but fay, this ought to be underflood in a qualify'd Senfe; and that Marriage fo far confers Grace, as, generally speaking, it confers Repentance, which every Body knows is a Step to Grace.

It must be confefs'd on all Hands, that Marriage is the most ferious Action that a Man can engage in, and therefore we ought to think of it, as we do of our latter End, with Fear and Trembling. For this Reafon, I cannot endure to hear People pafs their illnatur'd Jefts upon fo holy an Ordinance. If it is a Man's good Fortune to meet with a good Wife, he ought to date his Happiness in this World from that very Moment; and if the proves not as he defires, he ought to look over the Catalogue of his Sins, and interpret it as a Vifitation, or at least to take it patiently. For my Part, commend me to that Gentle man, who having marry'd a Lady of an extraordinary Capacity, never complain'd of his Fate, nor made his Spoufe uneafy, but honeftly thank'd God, that now he had a Hole to put his Head in.

The Ladies that read a Book call'd Marriage-Ceremonies, will find fufficient Reafon to thank Providence that they were born in fo good-natur'd an Ifland as ours is, where the Preliminaries to Marriage are nothing near fo morofe and fevere as they are in

fome

fome Places in the World. To give an Inftance of. this, our Author of the Marriage-Ceremonies tells us, P. 51. Among the Sabrians, (a Sort of mungril Chriftians, that live on the Confines of Perfia next Turkey) the Parties meeting together at Church, the Minifter makes the Bride fwear before the Women that he is a Virgin. As ill an Opinion as the World unjustly entertains of our Females, I am very well fatisfy'd, that there are above forty thousand confciencious Wives, within the Bills of Mortality, that would have loft all, before they would have taken so rash and infnaring an Oath. How is it poffible that a Woman fhould pofitively fwear to an imaginary Thing, which may be loft (the Lord knows how) between fleeping and waking? This I am fure of, that no Hufband was a Jot the fecurer for preferibing arbitrary and unlawful Oaths.

Yet, as great a Hardship as this may feem to be, it is nothing in Comparison of Hardflips practis'd in fome Countries, even after the Nuptial Ceremonies are perform'd. Thus we find in the faid Book, p. 42. That among the Greeks, if the Women find in the Bed the next Day any Sign of a loft Virginity, they make a great Feaft; but when that is wanting, they Jay nothing, the Bridegroom fending back the Bride to her Relations and Frierds. The fame inhuman Cuftom is likewife obferv'd by the Perfians, as the Reader may fee, p 64, by the Moors of Moroco, p. 73, the Inhabitants of the Kingdom of Fez, p. 75, by thofe of Algiers and Tunis, P. 79, by the Spaniards, who retain this Cuftom from the Moors, p. 22, and lately by the Jews in Barbary. As for the latter, I don't wonder at it to find fuch Ufage among them, becaufe they were a ftiff neck'd People, that was always demanding Signs and Tokens; nor among Infidels and Mahometars; but that any Chriftians, that are happily.freed from the Levitical Bondage, fhould ftill hanker after the old fuperftitious Leaven, is a Matter of the greatest Astonishment to me. I cannot but reflect with Horror, how many Ladies in England, that now live comfortably

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with

with their Husbands, and are blefs'd with a numerous Iffue, had been shamefully difcarded and fent Home, if ever fuch an unrighteous Fashion as this had got Footing among us. It feems to argue a great deal of Cruelty in the Men, that they fhould relifh no Pleafure but what comes at the Expence of their deareft Conforts. But it is my daily Prayer, that Providence will protect the free-born Women of England from fuch bloody-minded Husbands.

But tho' the greatest Part of the World are fo extravagantly fond of Virginity, yet we find there are fome People that have no other Notions of Things. Our faid Author, p. 88, acquaints, That when one of Conchin marries, whosoever he is, he may not lie with his Bride the first Night, but is oblig'd to give her to a Bramine, who lies with her; and that they believe this to be a Favour, and a good Omen. I hope their Parishes in this Country are not of a large Extent, otherwise the Prieft has more Work upon his Hands than he will go thro' with, unless he keeps a Curate or two to relieve him, when Marriage comes in thick. The Holders forth of our Conventicles affect to be thought great Fains-Takers, and really deferve the Name, for their Bands will teftify for them, both in the DogDays, and out, of the Dog-Days, that they fweat exceedingly. But, alas! what is this, if confider'd in the fame Scales with the Drudgery that these Priests undergo in their Miniftry. I have often wonder'd that the Popish Clergy, that ftand up fo ftifly for the Divine Right of Firft-fruits, don't troop in Shoals to this Kingdom, when they voluntarily pay fuch an extraordinary Tribute to the Church.

'Tis obfervable, that in most Countries of the World this Ceremony is perform'd by the Priesthood, who, if they equally pretended to the Power of Loofing, as they do to that of Tying, they would have more Bufinefs upon their Hands, than they could well difpenfe with. Only in Turkey marry'd People are join'd together by the Cadey, or Civil Magiftrate, and here in

England,

England, in Oliver's Time, by a Juftice of Peace; the Reafon alledg'd for it then, was, that none was fo well qualify'd to marry others as he, who, by his Office, was impower'd to lay People by the Heels, and put them into the Stocks.

As I have already taken Notice, Virginity is reckon'd fo effential to Marriage, in feveral Countries, that the poor Bride is inhumanly difmifs'd, and fent Home to her Relations, if the be found defective in that Particular; but in this Author we fall find, that all the World is not of this Humour; in Pegu, of the Marriage Ceremonies, p. 96, The King, and those of the greatest Quality, lie not the firft Night with their Wives, but admit others, and pay them bountifully that will givethemselves the Trouble. With all due Refpect to our Women be it fpoken, I humbly conceive, that one half at least of the marry'd Men in this Kingdom, if they will fpeak their Minds freely, muft do their Wives this Juftice, as to own, that they fav'd this Porters-Drudgery, as a Monarch (not inferior to Solomon for Wifdom) rightly call'd it. Our Neighbours of Scotland, before they came to be civiliz'd, ufed to lie the first Night with the Bride, their Vassal;. but now they have flung up fuch a troublesome Piece of State, and make their Tenants drudge for themfelves.

We rail at the Church of Rome, and not without Reafon, for exacting implicite Obedience from her Sons, but, alas! what fignifies it, to take a few Articles upon the Credit of the Prieft; but to take a Wife (as our Author tells us they do in Mofcory, and other Places) without feeing her once, or knowing what Defects the may have, is fomewhat hard upon the Subject. Heaven be prais'd, that here in England we are not forc'd to buy a Pig in a Poke; nay, there are fome marry'd Men in the World, that were as intimately acquainted with their Wives before Marriage, as ever they were after. See now what it is to live ander'