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fober, he again made his appearance. His mafter gave him a most severe reprimand, and called him an idle, drunken, vicious fellow. "Sir," faid William, very pertly, "If I do get drunk now and then, I only do it for the good of my country, and * in obedience to your wifhes." Mr. Fantom, thoroughly provoked, now began to fcold him in words not fit to be repeated, and asked him what he meant. "Why, Sir," faid William, "you are a • 'philofopher you know; and I have often "overheard you fay to your company,

that private vices are public benefits;

"and fo I thought that getting drunk "was as pleasant a way of doing good to "the public as any, especially when I "could oblige my mafter at the fame "time."

"Get out of my house," faid Mr. Fan"I do not defire to

tom in a great rage.

stay a moment longer," faid William, "fo pay me my wages."" Not I in"deed," replied the mafter; "nor will I

66

give you a character; fo never let me "fee your face again." face again."

William took his master at his word, and not only got of the house, but went out of the country too as fast as poffible. When they found he was really gone, they made a hue-and-cry, in order to detain him till they had examined if he had left every thing in the houfe as he had found it. But William had got out of reach, knowing he could not ftand fuch a fcrutiny. On examination, Mr. Fantom found that all his old port was gone, and Mrs. Fantom miffed three of her beft new spoons. William was purfued, but without fuccefs; and Mr. Fantom was fo much discompofed, that he could not, for the rest of the day, talk on any fubject but his wine and his spoons, nor harangue on any project but that of recovering both by bringing William to justice.

Some days paffed away, in which Mr. Fantom, having had time to cool, began to be ashamed that he had been betrayed

into fuch ungoverned paffion. He made the best excuse he could; faid no man was perfect, and though he owned he had been too violent, yet he ftill hoped William would be brought to the punishment he deserved. “In the mean time," said Mr. Trueman," seeing how ill philofophy "has agreed with your man, fuppofe you "were to fet about teaching your maids a "little religion?" Mr. Fantom coolly replied, "that the impertinent retort of a "drunken footman could not spoil a fyf"em."-"Your fyftem, however, and

your own behaviour," faid Trueman, "have made that footman a fcoundrel: "and you are answerable for his offences."" Not I truly," faid Fantom; "he has feen me do no harm; he has "neither feen me cheat, gamble, nor get "drunk; and I defy you to fay I corrupt my fervants. I am a moral man, “Sir.”

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"mankind."—" Mr. Fantom," faid True"I feel that I have a general good"will to all my brethren of mankind; " and if I had as much money in my purse "as I have love in my heart, I truft I "fhould prove it: all I fay is, that, in a

ftation of life where I cannot do much, "I am more called upon to procure the

happiness of a poor neighbour, who has "no one else to look to, than to form "wild plans for the good of mankind, "too extenfive to be accomplished, and "too chimerical to be put in practice. "It is the height of folly for a little igno"rant tradefman to diftract himfelf with

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projecting schemes which require the "wisdom of fcholars, the experience of statesmen, and the power of kings to accomplish. I cannot free whole coun"tries, nor reform the evils of fociety at large, but I can free an aggrieved wretch "in a workhoufe; I can relieve the dif "treffes of one of my journeymen; and I

VOL. IV.

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