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A TARCE written by Mr. O'Keeffe,
Spoken by Mr. Edwin in the Chara&ter of Linco,

March, 1782.

NCE more before you Lingo, firs, you see!

His leffon now--The Positive Degree.
Comparativò, what's our author's head!
Weigh it! 'twill prove superlativo-lead.
Malus, melior, pessimus--in brief,
Nominativò, he is called-O'Thief!
I am not the First Person, the Second, nor Third,
Who in this School of Nonsense his Nonsense has

heard :
Noun Adjective Stuff, that alone could not stand,
Without a Noun Substantive Fiddle at Hand!
But now without Musick he thinks to stand Neuter,
And that Farce, tho' Imperfect, may please you in


O you! to whom Poets must ever surrender!
Beauties, Wits, of the Masculine and Feminine




Ye Plurals, a fingular Art who can teach,
And make Actors and Authors learn All Parts of

For once.lay by the Rod, and your Flogging decline !
That what we mean for Gerunds may not prove

Supine ! -Perhaps I'm too wise, and too larned good folks ! So a truce with our science, a truce with our jokes ! And in good saber sadness one word let me say : Do but think that the School-boys have broke up

To-day; Forgive them their frolicks, and laugh at their


In th' Imperative Mood, should you view the Bard's

face, His Present Tense proves the Accusative Case; But should you be Dative of favour-like Stingo, Your Active Voice Paffive will cheer Him and Lingo.




its Revival at the THEATRE ROYAL in the Hay. MARKET, June 29, 3782.

Spoken by Mr. PALMER.


ONG fince, beneath this humble roof, this Play,

Wrought by true English Genius saw the day.
Forth from this humble roof it scarce has stray'd ;
In prouder Theatres 'twas never play'd.
There you have gap'd, and doz'do'er many a piece,
Patch'd up from France, or ftol'n from Rome or

Or made of shreds fromShakespeare's

Golden Fleece.
There Scholars, fimple nature cast afide,
Have trick'd their heroes out in Claffick pride ;
No Scenes, where genuine Passion runs to waste,
But all hedg’d in by frubs of Modern Taste!
Each Tragedy laid out like garden grounds,
One circling gravel marks its narrow bounds.
Lillo's plantations were of Forest growth
Shakespeare's the same-Great Nature's hand in both !

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Give me a tale the paflions to control,
“ Whose slightest word may harrow up the soul !".
A magick potion, of charm'd drugs commixt,
Where Pleasure courts, and Horror comes betwixt !

Such are the Scenes that we this night renew ; Scenes that your fathers were well pleas'd to view. . Once we half-paus'd—and while cold fears prevail, Strive with faint strokes to soften down the tale; But soon, attir'd in all its native woes, The Shade of Lillo to our Fancy rose. Check thy weak hand, it said, or seem'd to say, Nor of its manly vigour rob my Play! From British Annals I the story drew, And British Hearts shall feel, and bear it too. Pity shall move their souls, in spite of rules ; And Terror takes no leffon from the Schools. Speak to their Boroms, to their Feelings trust, You'll find their sentence generous and just.


To the Comedy of The EAST-INDIAN.

Spoken by Mr. PALME R.

July, 1782.


HEN the East Indian gives our Play a name,
With what a glow the Writer's breast should

What brilliant strokes thro' every Scene should run
Bright as ripe fruit, the side that's next the Sun !
Moguls and Nabobs should in judgement fit,
O'er Crores of Humour, and a Lack of Wit.

In our cold climate, we but vainly strive
To keep by hot-houses such fire alive;
And force by Art, when Nature's at a stand,
Dramatick Pine Apples at second hand.

Methinks I hear some Alderman, all hurry,
Cry, where's the Pellow ? Bring me out the Curry!
Be quiet, says his lady; filence, man!
Where's the Old China? Show me the Japan!
Psha! cries a Wit; the Plot's an Indian Screen
The Muse shall enter in a Palanquin;
And lovers, after many a foolish fray,
In Love's Pagoda lhall conclude the play.


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